I  I have always been a vocal person about how I feel on a lot of topics that not only concern me.  But the world and the people that live in it!  Most of my narratives I'd like to say come in the from of short stories or through my character Dangerous Dan teaching and reaching through his "Pimp Chronicles 101" So I decided to start blogging and here we are, "Speak On It!!!" ...Blessings and I hope this reaches the masses... 


Are we not tired of all the mass overwhelming productions that have been going on? (drama)  I am so over the state of the world right now!  It seems as if I am and have been speaking out on the same thing over and over and over to where I am now exhausted!  When is too much too much?? When is anything going to get better?  How long have we fought for civil rights?  Human rights? Women's rights?  Children rights? Political rights?  Social rights? Equality?  Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? It feels as if we are moving further and further into the background!  Like we are not seen and not heard!  That voices that have been screaming from life and the grave simply mean nothing! Like life is repeating itself over and over.  Slavery of emotions, money, setbacks, civil rights and personal rights are long gone.  Social media has now taken a turn for the worse and our president is using social media to hurt the many Americans that dwell in the US! How can we have freedom of speech and really get things done?  Freedom is speech is out here to hurt, harm and bully so many.  Are we tired of the state we live in?  We advocate for simple non-important issues.  How is the #metoo going to really assist the many issues we are having?  The #timesup movement?  I am for upward movement.  Are we tired yet?  Can we all boycott, march, advocate and petition for the ways of the world that are leading us into the grave with no more voices? I am tired to see such disenfranchisement.  How we are fighting to stay above water.  How some are giving the ILl-usion that all is well.  We (some) are really not.  Fighting, protecting, hurting, sadness, depression.  Fear is ruling the world.  Are we tired yet?  Maybe, just maybe me writing about all of this will not make a dent.  However, I am tired of all the rhetoric, defeat, keep fighting, keep pushing so much harder than we once did.  We have to (some) just about sell your soul in order to stay afloat! Perpetrating is the new normal! #arewetired should be trending and we all should come together as a unit and make it happen and not just talk about it.  Tweet about it, FaceBook or IG it on memes and pictures.  Are we tired yet?

Toy High


Is it that we are going backwards and not moving forwards?  Is it that some are  afraid of change that we would prefer to change it back to where many people were unhappy?  Where life made no sense.  Where freedom of speech and where you wanted to live was ever changing and ever growing? It seemingly feels as if we are living in the terrorist zone!  That we are moving towards a world of Marshal law.  That sociopaths walk among us and pretend to like us and hate themselves.  Killing not only others around them and then take their own lives.  The man depressed, oppressed and suppressed people that continue to walk among us like zombies.  We are soon like the walking dead.  Not knowing who will be angry for no reason. Catch us up in maddening drama conflicted from within.  Taking it out on innocent bystanders. 

Pedophiles, molesters, rapist, sexual aggression and disrespect of another human is the new norm!  Being disrespected for being a woman, being a man, being a child has no validity.  Seemingly, it never really has.  People from other countries being used and taken advantage of in all forms of slavery.  Never ever really being appreciated for what they bring to the table.  All men and women are slaves.  And the rich are enslaved to the money.  Those six figures, millions and billions don’t come without hard work!  The more money they make, the more they need to make.  The more problems they make.  The more haters they create.  Hardly no one can be trusted.  The constant of scrutinizing all that come around.  Driving oneself crazy trying to figure that shyt out!

People having mental and emotional breakdowns on the www!  For all to see!  Taking their lives, complaining, hurting, sharing death, murder, illness, happy, sad, break-ups.  Is this the world we live in?  Pushing through to make it in this world.  Trying to buy time so that can accomplish some of our dreams.  While others sit back and complain and do nothing.  Nothing to improve on their life. Stuck in time as time is ever so presently racing ahead of us.

Living where race, ethnic groups, religions are the wave of hate even more.  No one wants to be quiet of their hatred and disdain.  Making so many uncomfortable.  The law never stopped anyone from taking the law in their own hands. Spitting venom and hate.  Killing, murdering, beating is now again the new repetitive new norm.  Slavery looks better to some of them more and more.  Genocide would be better.  Nuclear bombs and the threat of firing them gets the narcissist hearts pumping.  Each feeling they have more power than the other.  They seemingly not think of us!  They clown us, “They will die for this shyt!” isn’t it such a selfish and petty move? 

As the water is still not properly cleaned in Flint and its more than apparent that the Mayor, Governor, President doesn’t give a damn!  They could die for all they care.  Whole cities shutting down looking like ghost towns.  Major metropolitan cities!  Disability and social security checks that are for the elderly are in constant threat of being cut and making senior citizens work well after their retirement.  Wall street and companies being selfish and trying to steal and screw some out of their retirement.  Being laid off, being fired.  Companies shutting down.  Not just small business’ but major name brand fortune 500 companies shutting down.  Stores, franchises not seeing nor making the monies to keep them open. 

Watching as so many have no lives and living from check to check while the rich seemingly get richer and abuses the money they receive spending it on vanity.  Those on the board selling their shares because the market is crashing.  Sex is frequent because those who cannot really afford to have a baby have many and many.  There is nothing new up under the sun.  The poor continue to have children they cannot afford.  However, woe to those who continue to bring children in this evil world.  Chaos, mayhem and maddening world that sucks the mere life out of you from the people that dwell in it.


We are told that love makes the world go around.  While I see differently.  I see more and more and more fakers and shakers Plastic women on the inside and outside.  Men who are desperate to be loved and yet don’t know how to loved nor be loved. Staying one step ahead of all the competition keeps some of us on the knowledge and help we could give.  Frightened that someone will get better, do better and have better than them.  Defaming them, defamation of character. Gossip pours like hot lava and seething ready to erupt at any given notice. 

Pressure, pressure and more and more pressure to perform.  To be someone or something else.  To run a race against ourselves.  To be takers and not givers.  To fake, to lie to manipulate, to use, to cry.  This is what we are living in.  It gets stronger in its nature. More than ever before.  Mini computers in our hands.  While we drive, walk, in church, at work, eating, bathroom this little device rules our world.  We are dedicated to what it offers.  No need talk, no need to leave the room nor the house.  You have all you need in your hand.  If you’d like, you can be someone else.  Or dream to be what you see on social media.

Rulers, men and women in position acting as if they care. Yet, yet nothing gets done.  Non-profits trying to push through.  Poor trying to pull themselves up.  There is no hope and no such thing as middle class.  Those daze are long gone.  Having a FICA score of 800 is something that would amaze many.  Being in debt is the new norm.  There is supposed to only be.  Upper middle-class and rich.  The rest of us mere mortals are playing catch up.  Some of us are pretending we have it like that!  Maybe some do.  If so, can we all be like the Jefferson’s and get a piece of the pie?

War, cries of war.  Threats of war are the norm.  The airport is always on high alert.  The natural disasters have hurt so many and left them without homes, families, food, clothing and their cars. Yet we all press forward racing against time, ourselves, those whom we envy because we see something they have.  Something we may like.  Maybe there are no us, no haters, no jealous obvious selfish people.  Maybe all the world is rid of its unselfish character and we all assist the next man and woman to move up. No backstabbing, assist climbing the ladder in success.  No deformation of character. 

This has turn into a reality unscripted show.  Seeing the world unravel.  People go crazy.  Police officers and those in high places getting away with no justification of what they do and have done.  It’s always a manic Monday for those who don’t fight the good fight and want to play and use the humans in this world as pawns. 

How can we fight the good fight?  How can we somehow work together and uplift and not tear down.  Why is religion? Sex? Hate? Culture? Race? Background? Run us? Puppets we are made into. High officials and those in secret socities.  Selling souls, compromising ones soul to slefishly hurt others. How can we walk away and do better?


Toy High




I am ova it!!!! Not proper grammar but it is how I indeed feel at this moment!  With Social media out and all of these celebs that are not making sure that they dip in the pool of tummy tuck, facial lifts, noses, eyes, cheek bones, boob fillers, lifters, adders, lipo, fat transfers, booty enhancers and hip enhancers and let's get our waist cinched too!  All these infamous folk are putting real women, ladies, old and young to "body shaming"  Know one looks original anymore.  All these damn additives!  Now I hear men say that "I wouldn't hit that!"  Whatever *side eye.  Because you would knowing that all of it is not her.  Puhhhleaaase!  I will not mention any names.  However, I'd recall a time where women of color were shamed for having full lips, hips and azz to go along with it.  Now it is in to not only tan to get color.  Noooooooo..... Your lips filled with collagen.  Noooooooo..... We need to have two big ole titties, azz, thighs and hips just like all those women of color have!!! Hmmmmm.... But yet women of color are America's most hated.  I can see why.... *side eye...the crae crae of this all is that now women of color are adding more booty, lips, boobs and are now under the knife more than ever!  In my super duper urban voice, "Where they do that at?"  *side eye and a smirk.   

How can a "regular" woman compete with a woman that has a man made body literally?  Stretch marks, cellulite, flanks, dark spots, scarring, imperfect things one can see is not attractive.  The men not all are getting more and more superficial and a lot of them that have the money will pay for their significant other to get the cuts sucks, lifts and transfers.  *more side eyes.  Look I am not against getting a little alteration.  If I could, I would get my boobs a cup smaller and lifted.  I sure would!  But.... let's be clear!  A lot of these reality stars, singers, rappers of allllll backgrounds from Shahs of Sunset to all the Hip Hop franchisees, Real Housewives franchise has had some major alterations!  It's more than obvious!  You can pull up or see footage from just a couple of years ago and see the significant changes!! So with young women, young girls and young ladies are now influenced by this and are getting under the knife to fix it!!! Because they feel, "If I look like that then all the men will want me too." Will they?  But in what way though?  Is it being sexually attractive to catch the men your number one priority?  Do you need the attention like that?   Maybe you do...it or will it be wrong of the many men that come at you because of what they SEE hit you in your DM's about "hooking up" will now make you happy or  disappoint you.  I'm just saying.  Thee so-called IG models and FB, Twitter enhanced women and young ladies see the attention of many!! Men and women.  Let's not forget there are many teenagers and young women that follow these women on social media! 

Listen there are some men I am not attracted to.  This is so true.  But this public, social media, let me throw stones at you because you DO NOT fit the norm of what I am seeing of the women that are getting cut up and sucked up to attract my visuals. Well YOU don't look like them so now I have an issue with you.  I will publicly shame you on your social media accounts.  I will shame you and make you feel bad because you do not have the hair, shape, height, complexion, hips, lips and tits I like.  You are not attractive to me!! Really???? Is that nice??? I mean really.  I do not go around saying to the men that I am not visually nor physically attracted to and tell them.  "Ummmm, you are too dark, not in shape, lose some weight, fix your teeth, get your life  right before you come at me boo boo!"  Snapping fingers and rolling eyes with a mean side aye and walk off.  Not cool!  This is very crass and extremely rude!  Do you not think that at any point men/women are not aware of their shortcomings physically? That even the "dime piece"  women have insecurities about themselves?  That a lot of women that walk the earth are worrrrried about how men see them and will try just about anything to attract the opposite sex? Or whatever sex they are attracted to?   

Being utterly superficial is the new norm.  Being thick in all the right places is the new norm.  When at one time it was considered to be "overweight" Now it is the hottest thing. Ooohhhh!  Look at her!  She is thick in all the right places!  Let's be clear... there are a lot of women have stretch marks from being to big and getting small.  Or small and getting big.  Also women that did NOT have the luxury of having babies and not getting stretch marks.  There are a lot of women that have dark spots on their body and are not flawless and have the luxury of getting lazed off.  There are plenty of women that have cellulite in various areas of their bodies.  There are women that no matter how much weight they lose will still have a "flawed" body.  It looks good in clothes but when the clothes are off you see every flaw and unattractive detail that that woman sees in the mirror daily. She is concerned about it and how it will come across a man when she is with him in the nude.  I like to call these the "real women"  Because there is nothing that they can do to get rid of these precarious flaws.  No matter how much fade cream, cocoa butter and all of the many things that are sold over the counters to get rid of these flaws.  Some of these things work.  But are not going to remove all of it! 

Look women are extremely harsh on themselves.  Let it be known.  Rather they like to admit it or not.  For those of you that are not.  I applaud you that you have never ever seen one flaw on your body. That you are as perfect as can be.  Well that was not for you.  Also there are some women that are harsh on other women and are cruel by saying negative things that hurt their feelings.  Body shaming,  just as these men are body shaming.  I am over it!  Completely!  If you don't like it, like her DO NOT body shame her!  Do you have any idea of the many young girls that are making themselves vomit, that are committing suicide because they are being body shamed?  The many depressed, oppressed, suppressed women and young girls that want to be accepted by others so they too can be labeled as "fine"  And yet..... and yet they are body shamed by comments and hateful verbiage that are left on their social media pages.   

Now let's talk about the many many women that have gone under the knife to get "perfected"  how even they are criticized for going under the knife.  Because not only do they want to look good for themselves.  They want to look good for society.  They want to get into the new "norm"  of what is accepted now. The many comments of how they look "different"  Being asked "Why did you do that to yourself?  You were perfect the way you were." But  they did not feel they were.  Gotta fit in.  Gotta attract the masses.  Gotta get the compliments.  Gotta be in the center of attention.  Selfies all day throughout the day.  Adulation, the sexy outfits, the sexy looks that are appeasing.  Do these women have low self-esteem?  Like the women that are so down on themselves that are promiscuous.  That sleep around for attention. To be liked, to be popular.  To be accepted by men because they do not have enough self confidence in themselves to just be them.  But really... who are they?  They don't even know.   

Low self-esteem comes from sooo many things.  Not receiving a lot of love as a child.  Being abused physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually.  Those who have been bullied, picked on.  Parents didn't have the money to buy clothes, so they sunk into themselves.  Trying to be the wallflower.  Those who were not good enough when they were younger so they become wild when they get older to get the attention they they did not received when they were young. From ugly duckling to swan now.  So let me be and do me!  Let me have the spotlight!  I need it to get love from people and it does not matter how I get it!  I just want it and need it!    

Let's be clear!  We all seek some form of attention from others.  Of course we do!  But how far will one go to get it?  To look like this barbie doll.  That you have had so many surgeries we have no idea of who you are anymore.  Because last week your nose was wide.  Now it's not.  Then last week you were B cup .  Now you have double D's.  You had flanks, now they are gone!  You had a tummy, no hips.  Whaaaaat???!!!! You look marvelous darling now!  Like I said,  there is nothing wrong with a little cosmetic alteration.  If it is truly needed.  But where are these young girls and women getting the money to put all of this plastic in their bodies?  How??? I mean these operations are not free?  As well as not cheap!!! Soooo Where is the money coming from?  I'm just saying.  Of course there are some underground facilities and people who are not licensed that can inject you with some silicone like substance so that YOU too may have this fabulous azz for all the men to lust after!  Isn't that grand! It's deep because some of these women are willing to die over having a bigger behind!  Like this is indeed a matter of life and death for them!  I guess.  So go ahead and do you for YOU if you must.  This is a do or die for you!  Again you need to have all this of wonderful attention because you NEED it.  Loving yourself by yourself and being all that you can be for you is never and will not ever be enough!  

No matter how you live your life it is indeed your life.  You are the captain of your own ship.  Your destiny and what you want for yourself is up to you.  Yes it is all up to you. 

I will say this, it is so sad that women/men have and are persuaded by society to act, talk, dress and look.  What is popular, trendy and what looks good in the eyes of others.  How we look to others.  Not really worrying about how we look to ourselves.  I mean deeply into ourselves.  Do you know yourself?  No, I mean do you really know yourself?  Not your favorite color, not your favorite food and what you do and don't like.  No I am speaking about are you open to all of your flaws.  Do people have to tell you what you are doing wrong?  Do you know how to analyze yourself?  No you  deeply on the inside?  When you act speak a certain way.  Are you able to say to yourself, "I need to correct this about me, myself." Can you not blame others for your personal choice and discretion's.  The valleys, trials and tribulations you have gone through.   Can you look at the man/woman in the mirror and judge yourself and work on improving your inner being and not your outer being with knives and going under a knife and getting fat sucked out and transferred.  Is it possible to just take care of your outer appearance?  To be the best you can be at all times?  Like I said.  I am all about self improvement.  The kind that starts from the inside first.  Because you can look good on  the outside all day everyday.  But will you be able to keep that man?  Will he find you attractive on the inside?  Do you have anything positive, wonderful, intelligent to say?  Is there any substance?  Or are you just something sexy and beautiful to look at? After so long a man will get tired of looking at you, having sex with you too!  Move on to something else.  Go ahead and take a look back at all of the beautiful curvaceous women that are sexy and some that have money.  They can tell you that their man still cheated!  Yes they did!  Ask the many women who have  have been in this situation.  They to thought their looks would keep a man!  Why wouldn't it?  They dressed i all the best finery, had the perfect body and looks!

I of course had to get this one out.  Because I am far from a flawless and perfect body!  I am human and expect those around me to treat me humane. I may not be your flavor, and I am fine with that.  I mean really  fine with that!  My ego is no longer fragile.  However, respect those women who are not glammed up, your cup of tea.  Speak, smile, say something nice.  Even if it is not a compliment.  Social media has allowed so many people to hide behind a cell phone, tablet, PC and Mac to criticize other's being.  Do I see things that are unattractive?  Yes!  Do I see things and read things that I do not agree with?  Well of course!  Do I judge situations, people, make judgement calls, laugh, clown around?  Sure! But no one, and I absolutely mean no one should body shame anyone and make others feel bed because they do not fit into their class of beauty!  


Toy High                                  





I thought that I could be really quiet on all of this.  But apparently not!!!!!! I feel as if I am in a reality TV show that has all the elements of Jersey Shore, Love Hip Hop of Atlanta, Bad Girls Club, Real Housewives of Atlanta and Real Housewives of Jersey and New York!  Now that is too much in itself in my opinion!!! As I sat back and watched a debacle, debate, gossip show, shade, lies, racist, slander, comedy and more in headlines, on TV, gossip sites and much more and many more social media sites I cringed as I never knew a lot of the things that I found out about on Dumbfounded delirious Donald Trump!!!!! WTH is the goings on???? How? Why??? When??? Where??? Did he even get the pull? Who even left the gates of hell open to even let him have one iota of a thought to even think of running for President of the United States?????  I knew and know there are a lot of mixed up azzholes, sociopaths, liars, manipulators and pure dumb azz’s in America that believed all the BS of what this man represented!!! Come on!!!! A man who has been married a plethora of times, filed bankruptcies many times, who says the most crass and crude things is in office and is suppose to run the US????? Jesus must be coming soon!!!!

This is a self centered, arrogant perv!  A bigot and a man who knows absolutely nothing of how to run a country but his mouth!!! I know a lot of people don’t think before they speak.  However this clown never ever thinks before he speaks!!!!!!  How is he still living??? Is he on the list to be murdered or killed?  Oh no wait!! Is he on the list to be assassinated?  Funny how he had so many supporters and even those supporters have walked away and Accepted their losses! 

When you have people of the same ethnic background as you are and they are shaking their heads over you.  You gotta be a pretty messed up person!  How did he get in?  They tried to find so much on Obama to shame him.  However you got this man who they have dug up a plethora of things on his wife, ex-wives, himself.  Yet, yet he has so much baggage and rubbish in his former life and present and we now have this man in office??!!! What has the world come to??? How did we get here?  How will this man help the country?  If he has ran his own business’ in the ground….hmmmmm….

I have no faith, never had faith in any man to take care of the US.  However what real complaints do we have for Obama??? A far cry from what Trump will do.  I see gas, rent, mortgages, food, utilities, life being a huge disarray!


Toy High


I am in the entertainment business.  Not the music business, but all around entertainment business.  So it is my personal job to stay on gossip blogs, follow certain celebrities, actors, athletes and so on.  There was one particular incident that has recently occurred that caught me extremely off guard.  Let me state first that yes, I am a fan of some rap music, But not all, Hip-Hop has changed a lot in it's genre since I have first started listening to it. So I am familiar and not familiar with the rapper Kevin Gates. I am not a fan of his work or music.  However just because I am not a fan of his work does  not mean I am a hater of the man and his music. I just don't particularly care for it.  I guess I am an old school Hip-Hop chick.  Whatever that means.

I did some research on Kevin Gates.  From my perspective and from what I have read he is a seriously hot commodity and very well liked in the Hip-Hop community.  Kudos to him!  However as you know my Speak On It!! Is very direct and from my heart and soul.  My opinion is this is a confused self-righteous man who feels and thinks he is a man of God and Allah.  I have never ever met a Muslim in my life that used profanity as the way Kevin Gates does.  A man of God that uses profane language as Kevin Gates does.  That offends my spirit, my soul and emotions.  Ohhhh no I am far from perfect!!!!! By far!!!!!! However the things that comes out of his mouth and the confusion he speaks is simply erratic diatribe that makes him "look"  as if he is some crass, rude  dumb azz! I do believe he is a very intelligent man. I just don't feel he shows it.  Could it be something he is drinking, breathing or smoking?  I am not ensuing that he is on drugs.  The one thing I do know is that he loves his wife, family and they indeed mean the world to him.  Does not the Qur'an or the Holy Bible say, "You cannot serve two masters?"  So why does Kevin Gates say things such as, " I am a fukn man of God." "I am a married man, don't put your dirty azz hands on me."  Is that something a man of God would say?  A Muslim would say?  First let me state for the record.  I have my pet peeves.  There are many men that do not know them.  One of them is to be called "Baby, love, sweetheart, dear, honey" by a man that I just met.  It is for me a privilege to be called these names by someone that loves you, that you are in a relationship with.  Married to.  I think and feel that calling a woman, me.  This places a pressure that I am yours.  Now, if my family members, senior citizens call me this no problem.  But if we just met, you approach me, want to date me.  It makes me feel hemmed in. Like we are in a relationship... Crazy?  Could be... However..............

 When I tell the men that meet me this, most inner stand.  Some don't.  Most apologize.  However, I tell them they had no idea.  So how would they know if they offended me?  No one knows anything unless you tell them.  So when Kevin Gates was interviewed by DJ Traci Steele for Birthday Bash in Atlanta Georgia.  For him to be rude and crass and give her a look of discontentment and disdain was unattractive.  There is and is not a way that one acts when being interviewed.  There was no level of professionalism at all.  Clearly!!!!!! He could have waited until the interview was over and told her that he did not liked to be touched by women.  Did she touch him sexually?  No!  Not at all!!! It was a gesture by touching his arm, happy to see him.  Right after he wiped his arm as if she had dog crap on her hand. Afterwards he looked at her as if she killed, murdered someone in his family.  His interview was very stealth afterwards.    He made her very uncomfortable, was very dry.  Traci Steele stayed very professional!  Big kudos to her!  A huge applause!

Not once have I ever heard a speech from a Muslim nor a Bishop, Pastor, Priest, Reverend, Evangelist where he/she said "I am fukn man/woman of God."  Is this a new religion now??? So many are now coming out!!! So many thing are changing.  Is the Muslim community exuberant and ecstatic over Kevin Gates?  Do they even claim him in the Muslim community?? Does Farrakhan endorse this sort of behavior?  I am only asking because I am unaware.  I know that in the community I am apart of they do not look too kindly upon profane language and God in the same sentence. I am quite uncomfortable with how he expresses himself and uses profane language.  How he speaks down to people.

I was taught by my mother that there is more than one way to skin a cat.  Also that there is a time and a place for everything.  A time to walk away, a time to speak up, a time to be quiet, a time to defend yourself.  Where is the level of respect??? Where is the level of self dignity?  For me as time moves forward, as it always does.  The world moves closer and closer to the negative, to bitterness, to racism, to selfish actions over and over and over.  Crime, murder and so on.  Finances, nerves on the edge. Some people are more quick than ever to hurt you.  The stresses of the world are numerable!!!!

My point also in this Speak On It!!! Is that when given a platform on any level one should always be humble, respectful,loyal to their art and the many fans that support their art.  Kevin Gates was not this famous "rapper" in my opinion he is not famous as some of the rappers I have heard about that generate from the south. I am simply not impressed by his music, nor his behavior!


Get your money! Hustle and do what it is in any legal format to make yourself known.  I am all for it!! However the unattractive behavior and mumble jumble of some of these artist.  Actors, writers, authors and so on.  It seems as if we are good for saying the not so nice things of people and then later wanting to apologize in the end.  However, Kevin Gates not once apologized since the publishing of this blog.




I am feeeeling a certain type of way.  Here it is 2016 and it seems as if the past eight years of life race and ethnicity have been in the forefront of life for a lot of minorities.  Why is this?  Why are we revisiting over and over with so many closed minds.  Are there not poor people, disenfranchised people, sick people, evil people, ignorant people, unemployed people, people who could care less of where they live, what they say, how they look people in all ethnic backgrounds???? Do we?  Or shall we continue to pick on the race of African Americans??? Why?? Why??? Why??? Why so much hate from "some"  who tend to look at African American people as the lowest of the lowest? The ones that get picked on for so much allll the time and placed on the firing squad more often than not! Not Chinese, Japanese, Latino, Swedish, Italian, Puerto Rican and so forth and so on.  However I am more than sure.  It is very definite that all of these ethnic groups are picked on in their country for being "too dark" "too poor" and so forth and so on.  They very much experience discrimination of course.  However, Isn't America based on the "land of the free"? That we have rights to be treated equally?  So why is that more African Americans being bullied, beaten, treated as if they are automatically lower class?  Italians, Swedish, Italians are not treated like that when they live in America!!  

My ancestry is full of so much it is totally ridiculous!!! My grandfather has blue crystalline eyes! I have aunts and uncles that could "pass" for the purest race there is on this earth! White! (because white is right) Of course people are scared of some Muslims because of what they have done.  But pretty much they were cool and the gang before 911.  No one in America were really worried about them.   

I am soooo tired of reading all of the headlines that appear on gossip blogs, Yahoo, MSN and many social media sites of the mistreatment of African Americans. Yes there are some who don't like Latino's, Japanese, Italians and so on.  However I now feel as if the world, (or some) are placing African Americans  back in the Civil Rights arena. Like slavery just ended. Like we are fighting to live, work, eat, but cars and homes.  Like African Americans are the only ones that rob, kill, steal and destroy!!! Look up some statistics, do some real research!  Not only in just America.  But in other countries.    

Has many ethnic backgrounds in and on this earth made some major steps and improvement?  Yes!!! Indeed we all have!! Why are the accomplishments and steps forward for a race of colored people not get praised?  However Steve Jobs, Bill Gates gets praised and worshiped! If "white people" are getting severely beaten for "nothing"  Then I apologize because the press, the media does not share nor show light on how you are being mistreated. Pick!! Pick!! Pick!!! Instead of uplifting African American's get picked on, probed and categorized in a not so grand light!  There is so much that this particular race has given, dedicated, moved forward, assisted, lived, knowledge, wisdom, witty inventions and so on.  That is not talked about.  


Wait!!! It seems that they are mimicked in so many genres.  Music, fashion, dialect, looks and so on! Why do some designers and moguls do not want African Americans purchasing their clothing, fragrance, shoes and so on? Hmmmmmm.   

It seems to me that once Barack got elected African Americans have been placed more front and center and more and more crisis, genocide, lynchings and so forth have placated America.  I am not saying that it did not exist before.  By no means! Just ironic and funny in a dumbfounded way!  

I have no room to be a bigot, racist of any sort. I have white, Indian, West Indies, African American, Creole and more in my veins.  Some say Irish as well.  So if I hate them, then I hate me.  I would be unable to love my family!  Damn Racism and all the people who feel that they are f*****g privileged to feel they are better! 

Toy High



First and foremost let me say this, I am not deeeep into politics as most. But I can't help but get involved in this mess of the messiest mess when it appears alllll over the place like; Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Google+, Yahoo, MSN and more! The headlines screeeeaaaam all over the place about Mr. Donald Trump! We hear and read less about the other candidates. Sure we hear and read about Hillary Clinton and the OTHERS that are running. But Donald Trump is the charismatic man on fire! He is the one that seems to take over everything with all of the seemingly inappropriate things he says. Now I will say this, I am not a fan of Donald Trump at all. Not at all! I never ever once knew that Donald Trump truly and dearly felt this way about a lot of people that walk and live on this earth! The crass and racist harsh things that come out of his mouth are simply crazy! Just to think that I was a fan of The Apprentice! What behooves me is he is the front runner in this presidential race! There are a lot of people in this world that LOVE him, feel him, love what he says and wants him to be the president! Now you can feel and want what you want. Speak what you want, and do what you want! By all means we have those rights! This is why I write my blog Speak On It!

This to me is the biggest side show in a circus! This is a reality show gone wrong! Have you seen the memes they have made of this man? How some people feel he is nothing but a big joke? In all my life never have I seen or witnessed such mayhem and silliness and a barrage of hopelessness ever in a presidential race!!!! This is in my words and my opinion a sad display.

I will say this, he is honest. Very honest in how he feels. Unlike some presidential candidates that give false hopes, lies and promises just to get into office and when they get in office perform poorly. That is all that I can say positive about Donald Trump. This presidential race makes me feel so hopeless. I also feel as if there is no hope for America and a new president that really cares about our well being. That this is a selfish and undaunted race filled with BS and mad confusion that is going back and forth speaking on things that are really no concern to the Americans. It is like when you follow a reality TV celebrity in their Instagram and a fan says something mean or crass to the celebrity and the celebrity “claps back” bring in Donald Trump in how he throws the other candidates under the bus with such vehement comments! Damn Donald! This should be beneath you! Why is a man who does not have any experience in government running for president anyways? Doesn't have a career or a degree in law nor any experience in government!

Is this the man we want in office? Is this not America? I had respect for hm when he was just Donald. Not this man who is obnoxious and pitiful and is talking bad about the president that has increased employment, gave affordable healthcare rather you liked it or not. Lowered gas prices and is the most loved president we have had in ages! Why demean him? Why have such a racist attitude? Why be so damn condescending? Why be so mean and hateful? I feel as if the devil is running for office and as soon as he gets in the world will be spinning out of damn control! Did not Obama assist our country in many areas? Can we dig up dirt on him? No! But Donald and his many marriages, affairs, his wife posing nude, his many failed business', business deals gone bad, bankruptcy! Is this a man qualified to run the US? You tell me!

Toy High




Being a business owner and entrepreneur. I have found out that now, all of a sudden a lot of “us” are not really supporting each other in business nor moral support. We may support verbally, saying things like “I would love to work with you.” “You have a lot of great ideas.” “I love what you do!” The list goes on and on. One can get excited and feel they are on their way! Making lead way in their career and business building and growing. Of course don't get me wrong, I clearly inner stand that not everyone that walks in your store will buy your merchandise. Of course there are lookey lous and those who do price comparisons and look for the better deals. That makes sense! Does it not? You are suppose to shop around! However, I personally feel that if there is someone that can assist you, not pay your way. But assist you in getting your foot in the door. Or assisting you to get business is what one should do. One should make sure that it is totally business, if you are friends. You keep that in mind and DO NOT cross the lines of the friendship you have established. You be sure to keep things totally professional. We all should know that. Keep your personal feelings at the door. But if I can, or you can give a leg up, unlock a door. Then one should do that! If there were no organizations that fed the homeless, clothe the homeless. Rehabilitation centers to help those with drug addictions. If there were no counselors to counsel, teachers, doctors. We are here to serve and give of ourselves. That is why we are here on earth.

No one to lie, get your hopes up high. To make promises that one can't keep. To say things to get you excited. Make one believe, “Oh yeah, I am here to help you and we indeed can do business together.” Give a company, person, business to prove themselves. We all need breaks!  

I have seen over the past month or longer. I mean really paying attention that there are so many that are stepping on others to get fame. Stepping on others to make what they do and who they are look minimal. Not good, there is enough money to make for all. Wal-mart does not have any beef or angst with Target. Ralph's, Kroegers don't have issues with one another. They all sell food! So why are we throwing mud and slinging dirt on what they do. Actors, rappers, singers, company and business owners are all here to make money and build their careers and business. There is not a business that sells clothing, hats, food, shoes. One phone company, one cell phone company, one type of music and one actor that starts in every movie! We, or some of us are so petty, jealous, “haters” even that all of these crabs in the bottom of the barrel trying to climb to the top and the other crabs pulling them down trying to race to the top and keep the others from making their way to the top.

Is it necessary to be cruel and say hateful things of others? To promise others a helping hand. Not giving others that helping hand is not serving, doing what we can so that we all eat. There again, is not one job for all of us in the entire world to work at. There are so many opportunities here in the world. So many advancements we can take advantage of. That is the way of the world. I am not saying do not work for it. Do not put your heart and soul into what you want. Take the good with the bad and stay positive even in the pool of negative. But to put someone down, to not assist when you can. To not help when you can. To not serve when you can is an insult to your character as a human being. All of the crisis that are going on in the world, corporations, companies and people come to the rescue and help. And yet as I seen people come out of the woodwork's to help those in need. I see others throwing mud, screaming insults, being cruel and saying hurtful and hateful things. When all you need to do is just help and keep your words to yourself. Negative words to themselves!

The simple pettiness of having someone/business work with you for you to make money. To grow your business. We should offer a helping hand. Why do we feel, or some of us feel the need to throw others under the bus and disregard what they want in life and what they are trying to do. Better themselves. Yes! Yes! And yes again! There are better singers, directors, grocery stores, clothing stores, computers and so on. However, I say again everyone wants to be successful! That does not necessarily mean fame. One would like to be a success as a business owner, a weight trainer. Clothing designer. Whatever they set their hands to do they want to prosper. If it is as simple as being a DJ, hair stylist. These people don't have to be in the world of Hollywood and working with celebrities. It just means that one is inundated with clients or business. Or being valued upon for their services.

If I give a party and can use a local DJ, he comes highly recommended then I should use their services. If they do a great job recommend them for another job. Graphic designers, photographers. Why pursue? Why push? Why give a client, business owner that needs help, a push some assistance in being successful or getting their foot in the door. To hate, throw stones and disregard someone for what they do and wanting to build their business is indeed a no no!

I have personally been around others who were growing their business. Just starting out, put in work, have meetings, discuss their services and how they can be beneficial to their potential client. And nothing, no phone calls, no text, no emails. Just left them hanging like a dangling participle in the atmosphere. Those who have gotten hired, written up proposals because the client or company was excited in working with them. And nothing! No business. “Oh I can help you!” And no help! Again we are to help, give a lending hand to others to assist them to get what they need and want in life. No one gets anywhere alone in this world. No one! Every successful person has had a staff, a recommendation, a team, advice, wisdom and knowledge. We all need that! So again my question is, why do we have people that make promises and don't keep them? Why do we have haters? To hate and be envious of what? Why do people continue to throw others under the bus for what they want to accomplish? Why is there all these crabs in a barrel when we can all work and help each other get to the next level and we don't do it?

Support, a helping hand, a word of encouragement, keeping ones word, recommending our services. Not always wanting something for nothing. We all are trying to make it! We all are trying to eat and pay our bills. This comes with help! This comes with support. No I am not saying that everyday, all the time our family or network has to go out and promote us our business and what we do. But we should be there for each other.

Stop hating, stop promising, stop being negative! Stop leading people on! Show your real and true character. If you don't want to keep people in your lives, then don't keep your word. Because it shows your real character!

Toy High




I am probably the last person that should speak on the Oscar's due in part that I have not watched them in years! ! Mainly because I am no longer interested in them as I once was as a child or young adult. The Oscar's is a show of awards that is bias and has snubbed a great deal of talented actors for years! And since this article is in regards to African Americans, let me say that not too many people if any of other diverse ethnic origins have won an award for their acting. Not like the white counterparts has. Reading all the many stories, vlogs, blogs, gossip sites and more that have a lot of directors, producers, writers and actors speaking up that are ''black'' people have always been slighted and not fully looked upon for the many contributions they have made in the world of film and television. Why now?? Have they not been overlooked on a plethora of things? Witty inventions, music, dance, writing, clothing and setting the stage for so many things that have been duplicated and have made a huge amount of money from and off of? So it should be no surprise that actors of color or other diverse ethnic groups with talent are not nominated.

For me there is no need to boycott the Oscar's. Not when we are finding no justice no peace in the world. We are being terrorized in many capacities! Senseless killings and murders to women, men and male youth. The continuum of racism that plagues our world with people of color. Especially African American, colored or black people. For those who wantto be politically correct. Racial profiling consistently, hate crimes have never stopped. And just to think, not one black person has started a plan to rise up and kill Jews, attack the Middle East nor bomb it. Raped, molested nor torture and beat other races and force them from their homeland to work under duress circumstances.

The KKK is back on their grind to let you know that they want white supremacy. Let black people do that and it would get shut down immediately! All we can do is have a calm protest or rally. SMDH....So why is it in 2016 are we not surprised that we are consistently alienated from a lot and not given the normal respect and just due? That everything that black people have fought for from civil rights, buying a home and living where we want to, working, buying, traveling and more is still very scrutinized.

Will it change anything that black people will be boycotting or speaking of boycotting the Oscar's? I say no. It has been bias, will stay bias and those on the board of the Academy I am sure really don't give a damn!! There may be a bit of chit chatter here and there, but I do not think it will make a difference.

I am so over the forget you, racism, we could careless, we can talk, do and say and treat you how we want to. That you really don't matter. #DEAD

Toy High




Wooooooooow!!!!! As I read the blogs, news online through various media outlets I am livid that so much, too much is going on in our world! Of course nothing is new under the sun. It is just that now we have so many outlets that out people that feel they may be getting away with murder so to speak!

The police officer that was pulling over women and raping them crying over his sentence! Really???!!! Are you kidding me???!! Come on! A police officer! He is not the first and shall not be the last man or woman that will commit heinous crimes against citizens that are being “pulled” over for what they may think is a normal routine stop. But they are getting assaulted???

We have not only police raping citizens, we have police brutality, we have murder, verbal and emotional assaults committed on the citizens of the world for no reason at all! Except that these police officers are sick sociopaths, racist and have severe psychological and emotional mental issues! How in the hell did they make it on the force? How do we continue to call the police to help us and be there for us in our time of need when all this BS is going on concurrently??!! So now we have this deep fear when we see cops, if we are going to be beaten, raped or brutalized in some way or another. SMH

Politics, the government, presidents.....who do you trust? Can you trust? Seemingly saying one thing and doing another. Some of these men and women that are elected into office have some serious indecent proclivities that always come to the forefront in one way or another! These men molest, have affairs, launder money, dope dealers, rape, factious, racist, liars and more! You promised! You said you had the backs of our concerns! Yet you are pulling the rug from under our feet! Who the hell do we trust? All these dark sinful secrets rush into our lives shaking our foundation and spewing over like molted lava. We are hurt, we are perplexed and sore. There is a scripture in the Bible that says put not all your faith and confidence in man. He will fail you every time. So true! This was written centuries ago!!

What about our parents? Not saying that parents were not low and had secret proclivities. But these parents who are killing their children, molesting their children, raping their children, abusing their children! The persons you trust when you are born into the world are your parents! We are suppose to protect, nurture and love us! Not belittle us, torture us mentally, verbally, sexually or emotionally! Where the hell do we do that at? If you knew that you despised children, why in the world did you have them? You knew you had issues? Or did you? Did you feel the deep urgency to abuse the children you brought into the world? Apparently not! Life is about choices, and this was the sick choice these parents made. So sad! My heart aches so badly for children who didn't ask to come here and have parents that hate them! As much as I love my own children. Shameful plug, Amber and Genesis High mommy loves you to life! You are such a major inspiration and hold a dear place in moms heart! I know you know this! *tears

We have these priest! Arrrrgggghhhh......all these indecent rapes and molestations that some of them commit knowing that you took an oath to God to guide and give spiritual guidance to your parishioners. Yet you are molesting and raping these young boys! *bitter face trusted by your congregation, and yet you are taking their children and doing foul things to them. This is also for the pastors, preachers, bishops who lie to women, men, boys and girls. Having affairs, having babies with your congregation???? Come on!!! If you know you are bi-sexual, like little boys and girls...you know...you know!!! This is not of God!!!! Period!!! Who do you trust? How do we trust? Who do we turn to? *mad at the world that contributes to this mess

We have high expectations of trust! We trust our friends, family, spouses and loved ones who have come into our cypher. We EXPECT them to be trustworthy. Not lie, cheat on us, hurt us, abuse us or even kill us! How in the world...do we get here??? If you want to consistently throw your fam and friends on the bus walk the hell away! If you want to have a plethora of affairs, babies on the side. LEAVE! Don't get married!! Live your life the way you want to! To plot to kill someone and kill someone because you no longer like them or love them. LEAVE....bye Felicia! Damn it is so simple! In my mind and head it is. However I do know that these people are sick and don't think that they are. I need an island, yeap, I need one. Something like Alcatraz, but on a huge level. All of you can go there. No jail, no prisons are needed. You all can have your proclivities and abuse one another. Live your life there! IJS No trust is needed because we, or they will all know what and who you are and your issues.

I just want to be able to trust what you say and do.....

Toy High





I am a bit peeved and perturbed at this moment. For the record because I am a writer and my business MP Ent. ( Malicious Pleasure Entertainment) I use social media for many of my promotions and marketing tools. Of course as we a plethora of companies, business' as well as personal are on Facebook. That there are many people that post the craziest things, (age does not have a thing to do with it) on Facebook. Twitter, Buzzfeed, Tumblr and Google+. Joke videos, pranks, home videos, children videos and so on. The memes we see, positive, negatie and funny messages and so on. However, the home videos from ones cell phones of parents disciplining their children and putting the video on Facebook to embarrass them to set them “straight” and on a path of so-called righteousness.

I happened to watch the new show TD Jake's and the parents that were on the show were explaining how they had caught their child doing something shameful on Facebook, school, away being “grown” with their friends. One man was on the show because he made a video of his daughter holding up a sign saying that she stole. She was standing and holding the sign in front of the business she had stole from. The father put the video on his Facebook page and the video went viral evvvvveeerywhere! It caught so much attention negative and positive! When he explained why he did it. He simply sated that he had been to prison. This was his only child, and he loved his daughter very much and did not want her to get close to doing bad things. Going to jail, because it is not a good place to be. He also stated that she has been on the straight and narrow since then.

I inner stood his logic. It made all perfect sense. When I saw the video on my timeline I understood his point of view. There was also a lady on the show that didn't know her daughter had a Facebook account and that she had taken pictures of herself in “sexy” underwear and posted them. She stated that her daughter had blocked her. However it was a friend of hers that had told her that she had a Facebook account. The mother had band her from Facebook. The daughter would go over to her friends to use the computer to log on. Of course the mother was livid when she saw the pics and the comments she was getting. The mom made a video revealing the daughters age. Which was fourteen! She had posted that she was eighteen on her account! With her daughter now on video crying stating her real age. That she still watched the Disney Channel and that she wore “regular” underwear that stated the days of the week and more. The mother said she that she had been molested and spoke on the many pedophiles in the world. How she had gotten pregnant at an early age and lived a life that was not good from being wild and loose and did not want her daughter to go down the same path she had gone. She had said, just as the father had. That she had loved her daughter very much! I got it! I get it. I assume now that it is because it is illegal to spank a child and you can go to jail for “abuse” and have your child taken away. This is the new discipline.

However, I must say that I have seen some videos that have gone viral that were too much for the internet. Or what I use at times, “Too much for colored TV” There also was a man on the show that totally disagreed with this form of discipline. He made a fake video of himself and son just to show the WWW that this was wrong. Of course the son did not know what was happening. But he was to cut all the hair of his sons hair off. When the son fell out crying, he stopped and then broke it down how bad this was for the child. Again I get it! I also agree that some things we have down and do are taken way tooooo far! Some of these videos I have come across with parent and children are overwhelming and over the top. The profane language that is overly abusive, the scare tactics, the humiliation of the child is just too much!

The one video I saw was of a mom that had come in to the bathroom and spoke of how nasty and filthy her daughter was. How she didn't bathe, wash her hair. How she wore extensions in her hair to look cute. And she din't buy new hair, how bad the hai smelled, she didn't washher hir either. How she didn't clean her room, how she wore sanitary pads because she urinated on herself. She even showed them on the floor in the bathroom! She humiliated not only herself, but her daughter more than she should! The daughter was obviously embarrassed and weeping! Her daughter kept trying to cover her face. But the mother had kept pulling her hand and arm back. She was about to hit her daughter and threatened hitting her if she put her hand back over her face.

I was disgusted and hurt and felt so embarrassed for the young girl. The mother had done this because she had flunked out of school and was getting bad grades. Her point was that she can be on Facebook all day and look “cute” and clean but she didn't translate that at school nor at home. The video was picked up by a young man that went to the same school. How I don't know. He wanted to embarrass the young girl, and of course thought it was hilarious! The school knew who posted the video and the young man was treated severely bad for these actions. Why would he do such a thing? He had humbly apologized for it. The young lady got support out of this world, people feeling bad for her more than teasing her of what her mother had done to her. Can one imagine the hurt, the deep and low self esteem and embarrassment on the 100th level this young girl felt? I felt it for her!

I am not sure if this is a good thing nor a bad thing. I am leaning more to the bad because of the last incident that happened I wrote upon. Do we need to embarrass our children for them to walk a straight and narrow? Does a video need to get over 63 million views forever shared on the WWW to make a point? A video that has gone viral and will never go away to teach a lesson? A video that will always be a constant reminder of what someone has done five years ago? Ten years ago? A constant reminder of hurt, shame and embarrassment? I am not sure that this is a good thing.

If I had the medium when my daughters were young I would not use it at all! First and foremost I was graciously blessed with young girls that did not get into trouble. Didn't talk back, were obedient and great girls. I stayed on my daughters without having to spank them often. No they were not perfect! But they were good girls that I was sure to take a lot of time out with and I loved on them a lot. Not saying that these parents did or does not love their children. They did what they felt was the right thing to do in their case. For me it would have never been an option. I would also be embarrassing myself! Raising and rearing a child starts from a baby. Sounds crazy, but it does! Consistent and persistent knowing your child and being their for them. Of coarse children will be children and will do as much as they can possibly do to try and get away with things. I believe this has been every child born on this planet from the beginning of time.

We live in a time where technology is so advanced and he world is moving so fast that our children are caught up in the many evils of this world. Growing up faster than they should. Twelve year olds are now looking an acting as if they are sixteen. Some teenagers are looking as if they are in their early twenties. Three and four years olds are on their parents ipads, cell phones playing games and know more than they should. All these technical gadgets do assist our children, but yet they are evil because they allow our kids so much lee way into other things. How many parents are putting a guard and parental controls on the many laptops, computers and tablets and phones of these children? Children have cell phones at the age of ten. They can access the world wide web. They see things they shouldn't.

I have that oxymoron catch 22 theory. I love technology, but I loath what it has done to our society!  




Are we, you and me truly free to be what we want to be? Why do we care what others think? Why do we continue to let others bother us by their rhetoric and name slaying? Simple...we are human and we do care what people think at the end of the day. No matter what one might say, we do want people and others to not only understand our life and what we do how we do what we do when we do it. We want people to inner stand us as well. There are very few people in the world that truly are like ducks and let negative talk roll off of our backs like the water off of a duck. But if it does roll off, why do some of these same people who say they don't care explain why they do what they do? Because they care! Again it is simple!

I have met a handful of people who truly don't care of what others think. However it took them a looooong while them to get there. They got there through years of abuse and being emotionally tired of certain occurrences that have happened over and over and over in their lives. So they built up a stone wall. This has taken time to do, hurt feelings and tired of explaining. So you build a wall of restraint. This doesn't mean that other things in ones life doesn't effect them. That they don't care. But when listening to constant criticism over and over they will come out and speak on it!

I am not the head judge in charge of the world, if I were so many things in this world would not occur. But if I could be the judge, the supreme ruler would I want to change others opinions and lives and make them do what they don't want to do. Though I have my personal opinions of what I see played out in my families lives and those whom I know. Those who I see in the media, some too much! Oh how I tire of seeing the same faces and articles of the same celebrities marking their every move.

Did Bruce Jenner have to come out the way he did? Did Ellen DeGeneres Have to come out the way she did? The mass of other people that come out of the “closet” do we really care? Apparently so because it makes headlines. However, is it okay to hate others for their choices? A life that they lead? No! No one should be bullied nor hated for their choices. Some even commit suicide or killed because they are who they are! So sad! Actually there is no equality! If we have to continue to fight for things in this world and all of the injustices then we do not live in a fair world! Why do women have to fight to be good at what they do? Why are women and other ethnic groups that are not of the Caucasian persuasion are considered to be the minority? So so we all live in a world that respects gender, race, housing, jobs? I don't think so!

Listen at the end of the day none of these people who are who they are and do what they do can save us from our saves. They do not pay our bills. Unless, unless we work for them. Yes I do disapprove of a lot of things people say and do! If not then I would not be writing this! Of course I judge what goes on in the world and more. But one persons opinion on many matters does not seem to make a big difference unless there are millions that agree and step up to the plate to make a difference.

People can literally kill themselves in so many ways. That is through the negative things they have gone through and the negative things they feel. Some things I feel should be left to ones self even if we have freedom of speech. It seems to me that some of us enjoy destroyning others with gossip and hateful things! Wars, racism, murder, jealousy and hate!

What is freedom really? Are we not suppose to be free to live, eat, work, play, travel, school and say what we want? Also whatever religious views we have serve who and what we want to serve? Though we may not agree, we are suppose to be free to do that! I feel, and have always felt that we live in the most oxymoron society. Everything is a catch 22! You can and you can't at the same time! I inner and understand the flow of ying and yang. But do we really want peace in our world? If there were peace, and I do mean true peace we would be able to contain it and sustain it? Would we be able to accept that we can all live together and not judge each other so harshly?

Some of us can be so mean! Can I be mean? Why sure! Have I been mean? Of course I have! However some things and some times I can keep my mouth closed and my opinions to myself. I indeed would not want someone to take their lives because of how they were mistreated by me in words or in deeds. They say stick and stones may hurt my burns but words will never hurt me! So untrue! Words linger and stain or brain with everlasting memories and have us feeling certain type of way as we grow up. Sure we can prove someone wrong! Sure some of the negative things motivate us to be and do better. But all are not the same. Some are more sensitive than others!

I can definitely say that I am a beautiful mess! I have to accept that about myself and my life and always continue to strive and do better and work out my flaws by just acknowledging them. This makes me a better person because I don't blame, I stand up to the plate. The more I accept the good the bad and the ugly. Those negative things play a very small role in my life because I am now more cognizant of who I am.

Life can be so simple! But why hate, why care so much of things that don't concern you?




Let me start off by saying this, we are allll selfish! We all need and want! This is why so many are scrambling and promoting our companies and ourselves to get what we need from what we want and who we want it from. It seems to make it you have to do much to expose yourself and the company or your business. No matter what it is! Example before I start rambling because I feel I am on that road already! TV is not TV anymore! We live in the fake world of “reality TV”where drama, gossip and fighting seems to capture the viewers to tune in and watch. What does it do? It builds the brand of the production company, the show, the people in the show as well. Now these people are “celebrities”

Take a look at politics! Never ever have we seen a new zoo review played before us in regards to the presidential race for the next president. Never ever in my life have I seen such buffoonery and drama and pure acts of ignorance when it came to certain issues. Yes there is always mud slinging and throw your opponent under the bus. But its is like watching trash TV! To be Anne Frank it's like watching a WWF competition! SMH! Very hard! But look at what it has done.... it has made many people in the media tune it to the archaic rhetoric that is being displayed before our very own eyes! This is more than a damn circus! To be totally honest, I really do not know what to call it because it is an utter display of silliness and sadness!

It is now a joke! People who have fame and a certain celebrity are now being chosen to do ad campaigns of various products and endorsements. I recalled when this was for reputable people. Now we choose the dramatic people, or reality celebrities because they now have notoriety! I recall when certain celebrities and stars had to uphold a certain reputation. If they did not they were stripped away from those endorsements.

Because of the business I own and run. I find that people want to hustle me and utilize my skills to get the big pay date. However they do not want to pay! I am now heading over to the other side of the coin. I apologize, LOL let me be clear! They want the fame, notoriety, the booming business and don't want to pay you for your hard work! When a person is asking for a $3,000 job and want to pay you $300 for you time and over exerted efforts! Does this make sense to you? If I were a famous individual that had a celeb clientele people would flock to me. I get it! But you can't expect to get a five star meal nor service by going to Mc Donald's! I do not care how nice the Mc Donald's is nor the area it is in. It serves and sells fast food. If you want a service, a job to be done then you have to pay for that service or job. That is short dog money gets you just that! So you can't want champagne!

The selfishness in all of this is wanting to be noticed! Wanting to call the shots and have that “look at me” “look at what I can do” and you need to give me and do for me like I want you to just so that I can be pushed to the forefront. You, and you will get what I give you because at the beginning and the end of the day it is not about you boo! Where do they do that at?

When things do not go our way. We yell, pout, scream, pull tantrums and act a damn nut! We shut our loved ones out of our circle. We become stubborn and hard to deal with because we feeeeeel that you OWE us what we ask no matter what it is. You should give it up so kindly and be grateful you were chosen! I will admit I have these views and thoughts at and in various points of my life. However it is not related in trying to beat the next woman/man that is qualified for the job. I can sit back and let one run a mock. Not a big deal to me! I can side step and back out with no shame nor hesitation. It is called principals and pride. I am humble, but I am not foolish nor stupid!

When you are secure of who you are and what you do. You don't need a side show nor circus act! Your work, your ethics and the way you conduct yourself speaks in volumes. Sure it would be great if I had some reality TV star or celebrity speak on my business and books! I am sure that my following and likes would increase as well as my sales and profits. But what about those who don't have that? Has their business truly suffered? Their name? What they do? Have they been able to have a successful business and maintained their values and morals in a crazy sick economy? Some have! Some have grown! It's called tenacity! That is the type of selfish one should have! Not this fake plastic selfishness where I will do, say and act out to make a dollar. How long will it last? At some point and time the public real loose interest!

I read an article of a man from Britain that created an app to block out anything on the Kardashians! Isn't that something? He literally took the time and effort to create an app so that you don't have to be bombarded or overwhelmed with the media in regards to the Kardashians! He is sick of them and apparently has spoken to a lot of people who are sick of them as well. Now I am not hating on any of them! In fact I can honestly say I feel bombarded, and have been in the past few years because no matter what you pull up on the internet. Yahoo, MSN or any social media outlet that gives you information you will see some story on the Kardashians! Now I cannot front, I will be honest that Kris Jenner is a genius in how she has branded herself and the Kardashian/Jenner name! I don't agree that this family gets all this attention and has not one talent at all. What do they do? Don't worry I will wait! However if you can get a Kardashian to promote your product for your selfish needs and can pay the freight! More power to you! Pimping ain't easy, however I will say that Kris Jenner makes it look easy!

There is nothing wrong with being selfish, it has its place in certain arenas I will admit. But all gold is not good gold. To use someone for their abilities and not allow them to shine in assisting you to shine. To think of someone as being less than you are because you are who you are is not a good selfish either. At the end of the day, where does being superficial selfish get you? Nowhere! Because superficial gets old! Which is why this man from Britain created this app!

I love promotions, advertising and great marketing schemes. That is my business and what I do. However I will not take advantage of anyone's talents, love, hope, work nor ethics for my personal and private gain in the negative way. We all use people, we can't get anywhere without the help of others! Let me be super uber clear! It is indeed the way of the world. But you do not make a person wear seven hats and pay them ten dollars and hour! I could careless if you are are not a celebrity! It isn't fair, and it is not ethical. Though people and companies get away with it everywhere all over the world. I guarantee you will have a revolving door and will waste many man hours in training people to work a meaningless job because they are not being paid for their time and skills. All because you are being selfish! Not smart!

You may get a lot of attention by acting a total zip fool to get the attention of the media. But what respect you will you be given or earned because you did it all in the face of being selfish and wanting all the attention and didn't want to share or being so utterly selfish that we think we have the spotlight ONLY! There is more than one fast food restaurants in the world. And yes at one time some went head to head in publicity and advertisements. However, the smart companies and people promote and advertise their services and selves without having to stoop to silly and subservient acts of selfishness to gain a following. Do you think Burger King is worried about Mc Donald's now? No! Why because though they may sell the same food. It is prepared differently. There are people who want charbroiled and not fried you know. Just as there are some followers who jump from person to person or company to company because of the trending. But when you are not trending are in the spotlight what is there to depend on? Why not be a leader and not a follower? Makes sense to me!

So what do we learn from personal growth and personal gain? When to be selfish and when to give? I may not have all the answers, but she does indeed have all the questions!

Toy High





I have no damn idea of where I would fit in this world as far as looks are concerned. Society has changed what is fine, beautiful, gorgeous, pretty and sexy. Not that I am trying to fit into society! However, what happened to real glamour? That old Hollywood like fairytale glam? When one saw a woman like Lena Horne, Dorothy Dandridge, Rita Hayworth, Diana Ross, Marilyn Monroe on the screen the women and men seemed to swoon in awe. Now all we see is this plastic BS that is placating the scene in and around celebrities. Who is real and who is fake! Never ever did I think I would see the day where plastic surgery would be the in thing to do! I know, I know this is nothing new. However, plastic surgery is now for the basic and not the rich. It seems plastic surgeons have lowered their prices! Some that is, not that it's cheap but.....

Now the question is, and I will ask myself. If you could get plastic surgery what would you get? Well I wouldn't get breast implants. But I would get them lifted. I wouldn't get “booty” or to be PC derriere injections or implants. Regardless of myths not all women that are of African American decent or mixed with African American, or of Latin ethnic culture have a shapely or rotund derriere! I was one that was unfortunate. (if one wants to look at that way according to society) I am okay and fine with it! Neither do I have a set of voluptuous hips to go along with it. And I am fine with that as well! Trust me! However, bleaching my skin, breast implants, anus injections, cheek and chin implants. No. Now if one suffers with issues that they need cosmetic surgery. I say go for it! Some people need it. But why are some so eager to make their breast bigger, hips wider, cheeks bigger and wider hips, bleach their skin and want more “Booty”?

It use to be only in the culture of African American that men adored women with a rotund behind, wait...wait I am going into another story. Let me stay on the path. Women of all ethnic cultures and backgrounds are now flocking to get breast implants and add more to their already hefty behind! You turn on the TV, especially reality TV shows and once a woman who had a B cup is now well endowed! Her derriere is explosive! When you already had enough, or more than enough to begin with! Now all we literally see is T&A! Is this the new norm? Is this the new fad? And though I hear many men say that “I don't want a woman who is plastic” These same men are flocking to these women! Gawking! Over zealous to be with these now fake and plastic women! Filled with their own fat from other areas of their body they had sucked out and sucked in other places. Silicone is the new sexy? Wait! Is that your real nose? Chin? Breast? Do you get botox? If I lit a match right now would you melt?

Just like drugs plastic surgery is very addictive. Some people stay up under the knife and now are unrecognizable! Where is the self-esteem? Is it in every surgery that you get? Does it truly make you feel better about you on the inside? Don't get me wrong, we can all do fine tuning here and there. It's called working out! Yes losing weight makes you feel better about yourself. It does! But why is getting plastic parts raise your self esteem ? So are you saying that you had some but really didn't. Oh but you were enhancing the self esteem you had???? Huh??? Are you doing this simply to be more attractive to others so that they will flock to you?

Again I don't see anything wrong with a little enhancement to look and feel better. So maybe I am a bit oxymoron! But this has gotten totally out of control!!!! I mean there are young girls who are looking up to these women and feeling it is okay to look this way and not be grateful for what they have. That you must look a certain type of way to be excepted. Or to attract the opposite sex or same sex, or whatever your preference is! Is this again another new norm? Taking “booty” shot selfies, exposing breast that are clearly not yours! Showing wide hips that you never had before in life! Now you are 44' across the hips when you started off it was a measly 33' or 36' what was wrong with that? I shrug my shoulders. So are you pretty? Am I pretty according to the new “society” rule. Natural beauty, breast, hips, chin, cheeks are no longer pretty! The ones you were born with.

I am not saying that all men are attracted to women who are plastic dolls. I mean obvious plastic dolls. Funny, some of these women are looking like porn stars! Like I need more and more and more! I guess it's wrong to go and buy a corset, a push up bra, and maybe a booty pad! LOL

If it boost your self esteem, if it makes you feeeeel good about YOUR life! Life has gotten so much better for you with the implants, who am I to SPEAK ON IT? My question is, why does it need to be over exposed in the media and on film? Is this the new pretty? Again if it is, I guess I am ugly...

Toy High



To be or not to be...that is the question...And it truly is! Either you are hot, or either you are cold! It is just that simple. I look back at all the rhetoric in the world. It is total insanity! Not including what is going on a persons personal life. That indeed adds tension to the already tense and pensive world! Some are living from pay check to pay check. Acting as if everything is still grand and wonderful on the outside. So sad, but it is all so true.

The world and those of course who live in it have had a major contribution to life. Those around them, those in the world that have left some madness and mayhem. These are what I call mixed signals! We are quick to tear each other down, abuse one another, take advantage of one another. To top all that off! Some of us are truly narcissist! If it isn't about ME, then who else really is there?

Politics, religions, wars, racism, family, crime, love, all has a self, for me, for us connotation. Though some of the things I mention may not seem, nor come across as selfish behavior. They are, it's single mindedness that has feelings that are the same. It is about me, really it is. But I will make it a little about you! Oxymoron isn't it? I see so many negative things that soon to plague the world. Bitterness is in the air now! Though there are some positive people who see that only as a “Bump in the word” They pray, meditate, keep smiling, great energy in the universe, think positive type of people. Is there enough of those though? Clearly its not!

We are all scramblers, runners, anxious people looking for the next best hustle, money, love and the next best thing to hit the market. Running around in a maze while the world crumbles into a state of emergency! We no longer seem to have shock value to anything. We are now, or should I say some of us. Therefore I won't get any letters or comments categorizing people. We are accustomed to seeing or hearing sad heart breaking stories on the news. Our hearts, or some of our hearts are no longer moved by sadness to some of the things that happen in the world. Desensitized is what they call it. I can help you, but I can't at the same damn time. I care but I don't care. I love you but I hate you! Where is the balance in all of this?

Does everything in the world have to be so chaotic? Apparently so. We are given this through social media of all platforms. We have an overwhelming stage for it. It's called the internet! We even have it on our phones! What a wonderful invention huh?

We are givers, and yet we are stingy! All again at the same time. So how is expectant for things to get better in the world that includes: Relationships, jobs, family, politics, wars, love. So on and so on. It is a confused and betwixt situation. Also when you break as much down going on in the world you would literally have a nervous break down! Try for a moment to think of the various things. Missing and exploited children, health crisis, abused children, sexually abused children, murderers, starvation, employment...whew! I had more but I will stop there. Imagine you had to carry all those burdens I mentioned on your shoulders and more!

We are, live and dwell in an oxymoron society. Some of us are worse off mentally, emotionally, physically and financially than others. For those who suffer all, or some of what I fore mentioned. We carry some heaviness that is now a “norm” for that walk in life. Some of us are programmed to the system that we fight daily. We shout, we write, we talk, we protest, we make laws. Yet, yet we are still programmed to abide and live, even think the way we do. Oxy-norm!

All of the people that walk this earth are a huge overwhelming mass of a beautiful mess! Perfectly flawed in our own perfections. That indeed is an oxymoron! How does one get acclimated to something that is not healthy or right? And yet loath and detest it at the same time? Normally if you don't like what you are wearing you change it! You don't like a certain food, drink, person. You don't eat, drink or come around that person. You change it! Why is it hard to change the things we say, do, feel, act ugly upon? If you have an answer, please let me know? Because at the end of the day, our norm is the new oxy-norm.

Toy High





I was born in the year of 1966, December. I unfortunately missed Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr. fighting for equality. I missed the Watts Race riots. I missed the Jim Crow laws that seemed to have been in existence for many many years. I missed the club era where some matched your skin to a paper bag. That was how you were determined if you could get in or not. I missed out on the silly rhetoric of prejudice on our own culture! Not liking someone because they are too dark or too fair in skin tone! Ridiculous! Now for the record this has nothing to do with what men and women are attracted to men who are of darker complexion, and you are of fair complexion. That is your choice. This goes deeper...much deeper.....

This small minded thinking between us as a unit is absurd! How can we expect other cultures to accept us, respect us if we are thinking in this manner? Why is their prejudice against “black people?” Why?? What did this class of race do to anyone to be treated as if we were bottom feeders? That we don't bathe, we are scavengers? We did nothing but provide free labor and were beaten, raped, molested by our fathers who raped our mothers. We were torn apart from our families. Removed from our original homes by force. Treated as if we had no soul. So how do you hate us?

I can imagine the hate mail and death threats the President receives because he is a black man! I cannot fathom it at all! The many people who loath and detest the ground he walks on. So what we have a black president! Has that made too many changes for African American people? On one hand yes, we have made some wonderful strides. But why does it have to be the progression of colored, black people, so innately called African Americans. Why are we not just “people”? A people of a different ethnic or cultural background? Is there not poor, criminally insane, disenfranchised, rich, intelligent, make bad mistakes in all races? One culture or race is not worse than the other. There are jails, prisons and insane asylums, ghettos all over the world. Those who are dying of cancer, AIDS or other health issues. Not one particular group of “people” endure tragedies or misfortunes. Yet we, or some I should say focus on African American.

Though it has never stopped, but don't you find it funny (not in the ha ha way) that since Obama has reigned in office that more and more police brutality's are now and have come to the surface? That we are now seeing more and more videos of police brutality against African Americans. Now placed on the forefront of the world, African Americans were now placed center stage! Rather it was good or bad. Unbeknownst to many of us. We were all being looked at just as our new President, Obama. By the way, the beatings of police brutality had never stopped against African Americans. It was always there!

There was an invisible precedence that was set before us. We were expected to straighten up and fly right. Speak, educate, walk, talk, live, perform at a high level. The pressure was now on! If this group, this race made a mistake it was put on the front burner. (more than ever) If Obama did something wrong, said something wrong, didn't rise to the occasion he was belittled and thrown so many curves of hard retribution. Yes! Of course other Presidents were thrown under the bus and ridiculed when they had said, done or didn't do what was right in the eyes of media and the residents of the United States. Look how many tried over and over and over non-stop to find something negative about this brilliant man President Obama! Wow!! Such hate and disdain! Like some political officials so much has been found in their background that brought public shame. No children outside of his marriage, drugs, affairs with men nor women. Nothing! Yet they still pursue to throw this man under the bus and place him under the microscope. Again, not that other Presidents had not gone through public persecution. Because I'm black! That is why the headhunters continue to bash and bash over and over. How do you clean up someones else's mess from the past eight years? Can we at least give this man a standing ovation?

There is still to this day a lot of prejudice against a people here in America that is uncalled for. Yes there were immigrants that came from all over to America. The Statue of Liberty says, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.” Was this for everyone? I mean really??? I guess not us...we were not or ever considered to be immigrants. We were here already. The funny thing is, or was. When the immigrants gotten to New York they lived in the same ghettos and slums as “colored” people at that time. However, while prejudice existed. These immigrants or new settlers were able to start business' and move on and forward while black people were still fighting for equal rights, good jobs, better housing, to be able to live and go where ever they wanted to. Not looked upon as dirty, unintelligent or unworthy. I mean we have proved over and over and over we are worthy of such praise and host a bevy of talents and intelligence. I mean look at how we are copied by so much of what we do and have accomplished. Again, all of our witty inventions, music, fashion and more have been duplicated.

I cannot tell you the many stories I have heard from my mother and father how they were discriminated against. How I have made sure, I mean by not dressing, speaking, hanging or being around “those” who did the wrong thing or said the wrong thing. Why? Because I didn't want to be categorized and classified as such. I fought in my own way to sharpen my own edges. I loath the embarrassing things my culture did and said. Feeling they were saying to the masses, “We are exactly what you said we we are.” How they were portrayed in the media and to society. I still to this day loath and detest placing people in categories!!! I say it allll the time! I stick to it! How is one to fight mentally, goals, dreams and adversities because of the pain, hurt and struggle not to be like “Them”? A question that I struggle with....the shame I feel for my people. Though I come from a diverse background of ethnicity's. I don't believe that one person who is African American can wholly say their background is 100% pure. But when I hear stories of my father speaking on racism and diversity in how he was raised. His family members turning their backs on him because they were now “passing” because they wanted a better life. It is indeed so sad to hear. While my mother and her side of the family didn't embrace their diversity and take to it as unkindly as my fathers side. My mother recalls meeting relatives that she thought were “white” her own mother not being pure. Her mother appearing to be “Indian” some doctors have said. Having straight hair that reached her knees and a light caramel complexion. Who was one generation from slavery and was a sharecropper. Along with her father who was full blooded Black Indian, but was called a “nigga” All because at that time Indians, colored people were considered the bottom of the barrel. So they took to one another. They embraced the hardships together and mixed the races.

It is so hurtful that still in 2015 black people, colored people, African American people are looked at in disdain! Like some ugly cancer you can't get rid of. That some are still beaten, hated, and detested for who they are. That when going on interviews, traveling, looking for a house or buying a car or still frowned upon. That no matter how many of African American people are successful. We are all still categorized as bottom feeders. The NYLTH, (niggas you love to hate) That now me, living in the south, I still see and feel the incredulous looks of prejudice. From some of the whites that so happen to see me in all my glory, say, “I love the way you dress! I love your look! I don't see many that dress like you or speak.” Or my name, when I go on interviews. They are expecting a “white” female or some have told me outright. They thought I was from an Asian background. That is until they see me! I scoff at this! Not that I have any prejudices at all! None! And I say again, are we not all trying to make it from day to day? Are we all not trying to keep a roof over our heads, eat, vacation, hang out here and there? Wanting love? It seems we all “want the pursuit of happiness” which is never ending.

I do have some answers, I truly do. But that would make this a book, and not a blog. To me it's just like Christianity, many people loath and detest Christians. From Ceaser till now, not one religion is put down more than this one. Isn't t funny that the apostles and Jesus were men of color as well? Come on! You had to know this! He was born in a region of the country where people were “colored” just like us!

Toy High


My Soul Ain't For Sale!

Is Reality TV The Reality We Need?

I have been behooved and taken back by these women, young ladies that have placed themselves on purpose in precarious situations! I tire of seeing it on TV, reading it in gossip columns, the news on various reputable search engines like Yahoo, MSN. Facebook and blogs. This has nothing to do with age, age is nothing but a number because now we see and read women that are of mature age are making pure spectacles of themselves all for a dollar! What examples are we setting for the little girls in the world? Teenage girls that are very impressionable and follow these women and young women on social media? What happen to teaching and setting the role as a mother to her children. Going to college, starting your own business, being a good wife? Not a slut, hoar, sloring, taking pictures of your body parts and placing them on and in social media so that you can to get attention.

We sit back and watch and read about the cat fights, arguments, sex lives, cursing and pure disrespect. How these women let their lives play out for the world to see. Staying in abusive relationships with men and women. Dragging themselves in the mud being ridiculed by society. Later on posting on their fan pages, Twitter and Instagram profiles how they are not worried. Voicing their pain, throwing vulgar statements to those who have hurt them.

Be a living example! I am not asking for perfection because there is not one person that is perfect because we all have flaws. But these women bask in telling their private business! They go on radio and talk shows expressing their vehement for so many. How did we get here? How do we keep throwing dirt and shade on others? How do we become haters? How do we feel so at ease to let the world know what and who we are doing it with? This just so happens to be the new norm! What happened to women uplifting and encouraging one another? Those days seemed to be long gone! The reality is that reality TV is the new reality and everyone wants to view it and a piece of it. I cannot keep up with the many reality shows that have been on TV and are on TV today.

Trash talking, fighting, mudslinging, using profane language to express ones feelings, disrespect, low self-esteem seems to be the rage these days. Reality TV is nothing but soap operas, notice that many of the soap operas are now off the air. However, why do we need them? We have reality TV! These people open up their lives and show the world, those who watch what they do, when they do what they do and how they do it! It is so sad that those who were simply “regular” people now have budgenning careers just from acting an azz on TV! The perfect platform for these people to write books, start business', get a singing career, acting career, travel. They are now asked to promote other products because their rise to fame, and now they get paid for it! Now I am no hater! Get your money and make your coin. But was it worth it? When you go back in time after all the hoo rah is is over will you have regrets? What about the embarrassment you cause yourself and your family? All the new leeches that now have attached themselves to your new celebrity. Some of these women and men have children! What type of example is one setting?

Your name, your reputation is very important! When someone types in your name, or remembers you from the show you starred in. They are not going to remember the positive, they are going to remember the negative! How many positive reality shows are there on TV? Take your time, don't worry I will wait! Clock ticking....

Let me be straight forward, we could allll do a reality show of our lives. The many arguments, break-ups, family dissension, sexual conquest of our lives. But is it necessary to put it out there? Then we have all the radio stations, bloggers, gossip columnist and talk shows adding to the fame. Do we see real movie stars, singers and celebrities placing themselves in the limelight? No! They want to stay as far away as they can from people knowing their personal and private business. But now you have these attention seekers, a deep need to be seen and heard. So sad. If you follow these “reality stars” on any social media platform you will read all the many negative comments that are left on their profile. Placing yourself in such a precarious situation such as letting people know who you are and what you do places you in a different arena now. Who wants to really, for real be known as a hoar, a thot, a cheater, slut? I guess how one is betrayed and looked upon is not of importance anymore.

There are no examples, no real examples on these shows. We are bombarded and placated with messy BS that is not worth us being involved with on TV. But we watch it, these are high rated shows because of the trash talking and mudslinging. It seems to be okay going to jail, getting pregnant, having babies, being cheated on, being verbally abused and put down by friends or a significant other. Now we have children, teenagers, young adults looking at these reality TV stars and pattering their lives after theirs.

We fight for equality, for respect, we fight for life! Now it is all demeaned and thrown to the waist side because of what we see on TV. How do we advocate for so many things in this world and yet when we turn on our TV and see all of this shade and buffoonery we now have to fight against all of that? It seems we promote lust, lies, fighting and misguided thoughts because it is the in thing to do. So now you have to go to your child and tell them this is not the right path to go down. How in this day and age can one cover their child from things that are displayed openly and known openly?

What legacy are you leaving? That is was cool to walk around half naked? To commit adultery, to sleep around and make porn tapes? How much did you get paid? Is it, was it all worth it in the end? Why Compromise Your Soul? ( a shameless plug of my new book sold on Amazon and Barnes and Nobel) But this is what you are doing! I would be damned if my children, family and grandchildren see me on TV degrading myself to a low point. I am judged daily I am sure from the way I talk, dress and act. But I will be damned if my legacy or good name will be ruined by some junk TV that is making more money off of me than I will ever see! Once you ruin your name, that is a wrap! It is hard to come back from all the public shame! Some do, and I give credit to where credit is due. They learn in the end that none of it was worth hit. They take that platform that was placated with negative out-sight and express how and why it was wrong. The anger they felt, speaking on their past life. But when you say something positive, do something positive, we can turn our TV on and see you act a complete idiot still!

Toy High



Why Compromise Your Soul?

Religions & Values!!!!!

Count down to Armageddon! That's right I said it! It seems as if we are allll going backwards instead of forward in some case. The world is running fast to madness and mayhem quickly! From the crazy weather and disasters all over the world seemingly happening at one time. To the injustices coming to play out in the open more and more. Financial havoc exploding and people barley making it! When rich and the wealthy are having an issue, that says a lot! In some very critical cases I might add! The world is spinning out of control like a top! Come to think of it, I never knew the true fundamentals in how to make that tiny toy top spin. However my father knew just how to do it! I would get a kick out of it watching it spin on it's tiny pin drop bottom. Oops! Some may not know of this toy from back in the day. Today there are no real toys, electronics keep our children happy and occupied. However that is another story. Let me get back on that top spinning! Yes!! We, the world are spinning out of control. While some think they have control and on their grind doing what they love, what they need, getting what they want. The drama is ever evolving like a putrid soap opera of daily and nightly reality TV! You guessed it! You were right! When does the day to day and night time drama end? When do we? Why do we care of what happens in others lives and truly not our own and say they\we could careless about others troubles and BS drama when we do! Some of our lives is a melting pot of escalated drama and ratchetness daily! Did I use that word? Ratchet? I believe I just did....shrugging shoulders.

My beautiful wise mother told me this. “You have six months to get yourself together and another six months to keep it together. Therefore I don't have anytime to worry what's going on in the next persons life.” Correctamundo! Love it! She is right! However some of us don't do that, and cant do that. Life would not be fun if there were no good and evil. If there were no righteous and self-righteous or malicious behaviors or some captain save 'em to come and save the day or nah!

First let me speak a little on some of the recent and not so recent events that have been happening lately in America. As again my mother has said, (I will be quoting her often in this piece) “What is done in the dark will soon come to the light.” That is realer than Evander Hollyfield! It all catches up to you! Well, people of color, African-Americans, Niggas! Did she say that??? Yes she did! Don't be shocked behooved or bamboozled by me saying this word! A lot of us still use this word (as endearment, or so we say we do) that the slave master gave us with cruel intentions! The word meaning, a neglect to grow! Oh so we were the people that were brought over from Africa/Egypt/ Kemet were looked upon as socially ignorant and would never amount or become anything but farm animals to breed and work the land!!!! Seems that way....Well as we have fought and fought and fought for equality. Marched and partitioned fought, cried and participated in civil right activities to be treated equally screaming, “No justice no peace!” The cat has been let out of the bag! The ball has been dropped!! While yes there were those who were leading the slaves up north to freedom because “Niggas” were treated better there and given so-called “equal rights” I cannot say that I don't appreciate the Nat Turners, Harriet Tubmans that wanted to be free! Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, Marcus Garvey and the many people who marched, preached and laid their lives down for equal rights because a lot of America “Loves To Hate Black People” (my new reality TV show)

We all have been bamboozled, led astray because though some may feel as if we have and are living better. Racism has never ever stopped!! Truth be told, the KKK traded in those sheets, I said they traded in those sheets ( In my Malcolm X Denzel Washington voice) and they put on black robes and became judges. They put on badges and became the “law” deputies, sheriffs, policeman. Yeah, them! I am not talking the equality of other cultures and races on the force now. Yet some of them are racist and hate their own kind. However that is another story. Soooooooo....these attorney's, lawyers and prosecutors which were all white back in the day. Mostly white now, have been lending their hands to continue being prejudice and racist. Black people have never ever stopped being “Americas Most Wanted” So what we are in movies, directors, singers, actors and such. Living and driving and some maybe even working in areas that black people were not welcomed. However, how many of us are living the quote unquote, “American Dream”? Black people have and still catching hell all over the world you know! Loved that line that Laurence Fishburn had in School Daze!! My movie! Black people never ever stopped getting beat, killed, hurt, disrespected, hated, fired and lied to because they were black! Not never! It is now brought to the media (more attention now) of all our fallen angels which have been young and black (older as well, and women) being caught on film (since Rodney King) of the injustice of the KKK oops, policeman killing them right before our eyes by every day people (filming on cell phones) and now being played on ABC News for the whole world to see. We wish there could be more black Presidents, Mayors and Congressman! Which now in my opinion looks like a full and pure set up! But that is another story! Are we truly free? Are we truly able to walk and go anywhere and not feel an uneasiness because of the color of our skin? So what you have money, P Diddy had mad money to spare and burn in some of the white peoples fireplaces. Yet they did not want that hip-hop black skin and his cohorts living nor playing in the lilly white acres of the Hamptons! Yes there are a few of us there, tokens to let the world know, “We are not prejudice. You can stay and live here amongst us.” But can we without getting shot? Wearing a hoodie? Walking across the street. Going in our pocket, answering a question, looking the other way, not looking into the masters eyes when spoken too? Did she just say master? I believe she did! Shrugging shoulders. My people, my kind, my culture are being killed and beaten by the law for nothing! Taken to the slaughter and treated like cattle when we were brought here from our rich and beautiful land. A land, a place that is still rich with minerals, precious metals and more that America wish she had. That is why the white man has ownership...Whew....let me back up and off! Anyway, the many women and men young and old that have laid their lives down for nothing because they are hated and not wanted. All of the many riots, protest and marches. It won't stop! Trust me we are in for a civil upheaval and unrest because to be perfectly honest with you. We were never given our freedom papers to begin with.

That took a long time it seems, I guess I had more to say than I thought I did. However this piece is more on the “Creep low Dolla” ( many I have heard refer to him as) or Creflo Dollar incident. Before I begin on this let me please state that I was born and raised in the church. I love the Lord with all my heart! The Creator has been very good to me! Rather I have been a sinner, backslider, liar, manipulator I have asked and I have received. I have also learned huge lessons. Choices I made that caused my own demise and civil unrest (mentally & emotionally oh & financially) I say the count down to Armageddon because it seems now more and more we are hearing of so many religions now. I am not here to reach, teach and preach to the masses nor convert you to believe what I believe. You are your own person. However believing in God for a lot of people seems to be played out and viewed as stupid and like a deadbeat dad! While being spiritual and asking the universe, gods and goddesses, mythology and metaphysical is the new religion. I am not playing that down nor up, I am clearly speaking my mind. Muslims, Hindus, metaphysical spiritualist and Buddhism all still have the same premise! Faith, love, hope, believe and give of yourself. So before this offends too many people and my email is inundated with unkind letters. Think before you get heated and outraged! You feel, you believe, you think, what you do, when you do, what you do when you do it. Just as I think and feel and believe!

The world loves to throw what has been called “Christians” under the bus! The most hated “religion” like black people and niggas (those who neglect to grow) ever since Ceaser gave us the name Christians because they were followers of Christ. Hmmmm....wonder why? No one religion is talked about and spat on so much with such vigor and disdain! Hmmmm.....wonder why. Welllll, let me move on. Let me also set the record straight! Christians are seemingly looked upon as being “perfect” and once we slip and fall or get caught up the world acts a nut!! Don't they? Jeesh!!! I get it and I truly understand, but as the Bible has many claims and disclaimers, many dos and don't s and a lot of encouragements. Other religions do as well! Some religions are just carbon copies of what the scriptures say. (Christian belief)

Now let me be clear! I have slid down the gasoline muddy waters hell bent fires off and on for years!! So if you think for one minute that I am going to play Ms. I am all of that and you can't mess with me for one minute you got me twisted like a bi-sexual on crack! Did she just say that? Yes she did! I got your attention though didn't I? Ha! She did that! Snaps fingers and rolls eyes! OK...getting back. Though I have done many things that the Bible has told me not to do that does not mean that I don't believe!!! I don't pray, I don't affirm nor confess the word daily in my life! So why do we continue to throw stones at the leaders? Or anyone for that matter that believes in God? John 8:7 says, So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. Okay so you are perfect? Far from it, again there is a scripture that states, Romans 3:23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, It also clearly states in the scriptures, Isaiah 2:22 Stop trusting in mere humans, who have but a breath in their nostrils. Why hold them in esteem? Psalm 118:8 it is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in humans. Soooooo what I am saying if you read a little, and even check back back back in the day in and all of your philosophies, religions, metaphysical spiritualist beliefs. What you believe.... there has and always will be someone who has fallen out and acted an azz!! Wow!! Did she say that? Yes she did! DO NOT PUT ALL YOUR CONFIDENCE IN MAN HE WILL FAIL YOU EVERY TIME!!! We are angered when the politicians, mothers, fathers, laws, lawmakers, lovers, husbands, wives, friends so forth and so on disappoint us! We are hurt that they have come short of their word and left us hanging, literally failing us! How many times have you said, “I'm good” I have done it many of times! In fact was angered and kicked someone out of my life that didn't have my back when I was going through a rough time! This person said they loved me and would do anything for me. During that three months I was doing bad! Not once was I offered a crust of bread! Humans fail humans! It is life! So why do we feel the need to crucify every pastor, bishop, preacher when they sin and fall short? Most (if not all religions) teach non-hate, love, giving, don't commit murder, steal, fornicate, adultery. Yet when someone of the cloth falls into temptation we fall out and act a nut!!!! Let me state for the record that I do not agree with molestation, rape, incest, murder, adultery, fornication, theft, liars, haters so forth and so on. But let us keep it real!!! Just for one moment, some of us have committed if not one, but maybe two or three of these so-called sins and some laws! Now I have not raped, murdered been incestuous or nothing of that nature! God forbid! Lying yes! I take menus out of restaurants, uh that is stealing without asking. (I hope I didn't put myself on Americas Most Wanted for stealing menus! Dammit!) I curse at times, something “Christians” shouldn't do. I pull a shenanigan here and there, at times manipulative. I am not perfect and neither are you!!!

If Creflo Dollar stole the tithes! He has to answer to the Creator for that! Not you! If thirty other Bishops and pastors have affairs and make babies or molest little boys. They have to answer for that just like you have to answer for what you do! Remember what is done in the dark comes to light people! No one doesn't really talk of Muhammad and all the women he impregnated when he was being so self righteous getting high, wearing shades, (why was that?) and screwing a lot of the young women in his flock. We don't talk about that anymore. But we still talk about Jesus....hmmmm....wonder why? I am sure Mother Teresa that saint had a many day when everyone got on her last nerves!!! Probably stated “Whew these m****r f*****s are gettn on my nerves!” She was not perfect!! Gandhi who is looked also as one of the most subservient people to have walked the earth with a plethora of wisdom and kindness has had some days too! When Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane he was peeved!! He begged God to take this cup from him, and I am sure he said a couple of profane words to the disciples that were not recorded in the Bible! Like, you guys are sleeping and I asked you to pray! They looking for me like I stole sumthn and my nerves are shot to hell! And y'all up here sleep! I know I probably would have. (well maybe he didn't curse but who knows?) Wasn't Jesus tempted? Yes he was, he was strong, yet he was tempted! Did he act out and act up? Yes he did! He told a lot of people off, got frustrated and acted a nut at the temple! He was turned up! Throwing tables up and over! Now if you are offended by what I said, in my Jill Scott voice I am singing, “Whatever it is let it be.” Pops lips and rolls eyes. Gives a look like “say something!” We as a whole are quick to judge and get literally offended when someone judges us or tells us “how we act” I embrace my flaws and my greatness! It is a pet peeve of mine when others don't speak on their flaws and down others! I am also offended at those that judge others when they too are in the same damn boat! You know that you are unattractive, you know this! Yet you will speak on how someone else is unattractive too! Are you kidding me?! You are overweight and looking like a barrel and yet will speak on how obese someone else is?! Get your life in my Tamar Braxton voice! Stop the self righteous behavior! Am I guilty? Good God yes! I admit it while others truly look the other way!

Matthew 5:16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. All I am saying to you is no one is perfect and we get disappointed by the actions of others and what they do. Are we, am I? The world looked at these strong powerful leaders as saviors? Yeap! We do! Because if we didn't we wouldn't blow each and every scandal out of the water like we do! Create this throw stones at your glass house. When we know we just had sex with the neighbors wife or husband. Shaking my head. People expect leaders of all walks in life to be prefect and live and lead perfect lives without blemish! I inner stand that as well. However we must be real and honest no one man in this world or any world for that matter has lived a perfect life and is guilty of many treason's! I'm just saying!

Ecclesiastes 12:14 For God will bring every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil.

I am one to say that and believe wholly to much is given much is required. That is found in Luke 12:48. Again I am coming from my point of view and what I believe and not to tell you to think or believe what I do. If you believe that man evolved from apes then you do that! I do not believe that one bit in theory or non-theory! I do believe that whatever you put out in the universe you will get back, so a man thinketh so is he. I so believe in negative and positive thoughts and vibes and when there is too much negative and hate going on with the people I know around me and I don't want to act a zip damn fool! I must walk away! There have been situations that I have been in that have not let me walk away as fast as I want to. Yes I am flawed and host bad qualities. However I am not a hater, backstabber, jealous nor insecure woman. My wonderful positive intentions loving and nurturing self brings that out in other people. When you are cut out of my life, you are cut out because of your insecure and raucous behavior. So does it matter that Creflo stole the tithes of his church? Yes and no. Yes because that is not what a leader of the church should do. (if he did it, we have no real proof) No because that is between him and his conscience and his God! Did it matter to you when you cursed someone out and fell out and acted out or put someone down? When you cheated and lied? When you stole? When you used someone? Manipulated someone? The truth is your dirty laundry is not in or on social media. You are not a huge power player nor leader, celebrity or such. That is why your shame and guilt have not placated the airwaves or internet! Let me be clear once more! I do not agree what any leader that does wrong! Rather he be a man of God or nah! You must in all your inner being be a living example! But I do realize we are human! Damn... Hmmmmm....He without sin cast the first stone. As my mother has said many of times to me, as her mother has said to her. “If I tell you a hen dip snuff look under his right wing.” Meaning that, I tell you no lies, I give you the truth. The cold truth. That is what I did in my opinion today! I spoke on it! Because it seems to me that the self righteous are trying to be righteous and some are compromising their souls.... But why?.....Seemingly being it is the way of the world we live in. However, I would like to not put my soul up for sale......if I can help it...I am not perfect!

Toy High


Lights! Camera! Action! It has been in the forefront of my thoughts and my heart for the past six years or so how the African American race has been going back in time and producing “period films” Though I am a individual who loves and adores the history of an ethic group or race I am proud to be apart of. And it's many accomplishments. However there is also a semi grieving of my heart. Though slavery is not dead, my opinion. (there is a different form of slavery) We continue to relish in our past at times, for me seemingly not letting go of it. Let me explain, The Butler, The Help, Selma, The Book of Negroes and soon to be on the big screen Bessie. (of course I have not mentioned a lot of other films) There is a dichotomy with these films and TV shows that come out. That being said is, I love the fact that we tell the world of how African Americans were treated in a racist society. However the other side of me feels as if it is time to move on and not continue to “show light” to the past. Though if we don't know the past and acknowledge it, how can we as a people move forward and grow? This is my dichotomy, my wrestle, my oxymoron.

Do these movies about the struggles of racism help the African American community? Do they impact the world differently? And why is it that when these subservient movies come out that the actors are now nominated for an award? There has been a plethora of work that a lot of African American actors have worked on that deserves an Oscar! Denzel Washington won an Oscar for “Glory”and though he won an Oscar for Training Day that was not Mr. Washington's best work on the screen. And the Academy snubbed him on an Oscar or being nominated for his work the previous years for “crossover” films he has acted in. They felt giving him an Oscar for Training Day would make up for their oversight. Malcolm X! One of the prominent films ever made that should of given Denzel an Oscar. Mr. Washington received nothing! Yes this was a movie about race, racism. However this was a movie of a man that came from nothing and had gone through many changes and built himself into being a strong activist. Malcolm X, a public figure, motivational speaker! Who liberally spoke about the conditions of the African American people. The mindset of the people in this era. A building of a nation, Muslims, self-respect and self esteem. And many spoke of how Denzel had been snubbed once again for an Oscar.

My point being is that many of us in the past few years; African Americans have been receiving awards and being nominated for movies that have us as “The Help” literally. Whoppi Goldberg received an award for The Color Purple, which was a truly a touching film and one of my favorite films to date. Written by a wonderful writer/author Alice Walker. This film was still in the light of racism and the harshness of African American people. Another period piece, and in no way am I disrespecting this film. Though Whoppi Goldberg won an Oscar for her work in the movie Ghost. Was this movie truly a movie that deserved any awards? Again this is my opinion. However I am ecstatic that she being the first African American to receive an Oscar!

There are a plethora of roles that I have witnessed African American actors involved in that warranted Oscar's which for actors is the highest form of flattery! And why would it not be? However when recognized in the movie or entertainment industry for their body of work they have contributed. They receive awards from MTV, BET or the NAACP. Though I am grateful that they are being recognized for their work. Why is it that MTV, BET or the NAACP Awards or the ones that see the huge dynamics these actors have brought to the screen and the roles they played in these movies?

Can we not be honored and looked at for the body of work that we bring to the table and the world without doing a period piece or some racial back in the day this is what we went through to get where we are now? A mouthful I know! Does it help race relations now? Are we now and have been for years experiencing race crimes on a continuum? Aren't our little boys being shot to death by police and citizens killing our boys and girls because they thought they were being threatened? Did not Spike Lee tell you in the script about all of the young African Americans that were shot and killed in Do The Right Thing in 1989? The dissension and hate that has been prevalent in African American society since Africans were taking from the Mother Land and brought to America. Though we may live, eat, vacation, shop where we want to now. It hasn't stopped, the hate crimes, the racism. Have we overcome? Have we really? The only two organizations that still exist today and don't make as much noise as they did in the 1960's and 1970's. Are the SLCC (Southern Christian Leadership Conference) and the NAACP (National Association for the Advancement of Color People) It takes something tragic and detrimental for these organizations to stand up to the “man” and make some noise. Is not the fight for advancing still prominent?

Though I was born in the era of social and political change as well as racial tension. I cannot honestly say that I have witnessed Martin Luther King, Malcolm X nor the Black Panthers, NAACP or the SLCC fight for equality. But who is fighting? Who's doing the protesting here? Who is fighting for African Americans to still get better roles, more roles, produce better films of our talent and not the help or keep us dwelling in the past? Though these are stories and documentaries that indeed need to be told. However I am not feeling the buffoonery and the bamboozle of African Americans in film today. Though I thank Tyler Perry (for some movies not all) making movies that don't cast us in the past. And Spike Lee for always keeping it real. Was not Mo' Betta Blues,Jungle Fever and Do The Right Thing great movies that deserved an Oscar? Or at least an Oscar nod? What about What's Love Got To Do With It? What about Miss Evers Boys? Set It Off? So many films that were made in that were similar to these. Life stories, drama, dope dealing king pins. And they won awards! Example, The Godfather won many Oscars. Why not African American films?

This of course is my opinion, and my opinion only. Though again I am excited that African American actors are working. And that they are telling the many beautiful stories of all the many people who have made history and herstory. And yes they should be told! Yes indeed. All I am saying is why are we going backwards in some cases and not getting accolades for the brilliant body of work we have brought to the silver screen? I do understand whole heartedly that we now have a platform to show and tell all the struggles we have endured and continue to endure. And some are not aware of the many artist that have made a huge contribution to music, fashion, writing and more. But can we talk, see, motivate and support the present and how a lot of African Americans have contributed socially, politically and business worthy. These people need to be recognized!

Though I cried when Jaime Foxx cried and received his Oscar for Ray. He did a astronomical performance! But there are a lot of Oscars that have not been giving out!

There is still racial tension, and there are a lot of people that loath and despise the “color” of African Americans. We come in all shades. And we are loved and hated and hated to be loved. Music, fashion, our facial features, complexion, figures and richness. And yet since there are so many that want to be and look like African Americans getting all of these plastic botox operations to look more like the “colored” people. That does not help the racial climax that we are still as African Americans are experiencing in 2015!

Well I will end my opinion on this note. Maybe Jesus who is a man of color was showing us that we people of color will always suffer injustices, race relations, tension and issues. Because he was most wanted and hated! If we flip it, he was a motivational speaker, hated injustice, stood up for people and wanted to always Do The Right Thing. The irony in that alone is where I will leave my opinion.

Blessings, peace & favor

Toy High




Reading this, you will and may call me an oxymoron. And if you do you would hit the nail right in the head!!! I am an artist and yes!! I am the most super duper oxymoron person I know. Like, I love it and hate it alllll at the same damn time!! If this is your first time reading a Speak On It, then let me digress a bit and fill you in. Here on this blog, (the only blog I do of my feelings on my site! - now take that!!) I do not sugar coat anything at alllll!!!! I spit what I feel, see and hear wholeheartedly in my honesty with no damn filter!!! So here we goooo!!!

I am worn out, tired, over it, throw my hands up, exasperated and overwhelmed with all the many many social media outlets that we have access to on the world wide web!!! And yes I am apart of a plethora of these childless and motherless sites!!! Yes I like many really got deep into the program with “My Space!!! I had tried Black Planet, but I am not a huge fan of it, back then or now. I have opened and closed an account three times!!! And there has been years in between that I have had an account on Black Planet. Black Planet was a site that was a mix of booty call online come get it, stalkers, crazy, borderline mad hatters and a handful of people that really just wanted to meet other “black people” and pen-pal, get to know, possibly hook up and date have a few conversations. Buuuuut for me I seemed to attract the crazies, so I can't get into it. Now I do know a sleuth of those who love the site. I don't and no diss to Black Planet, but #imgood #ireallydontneedthatshyt #youcanhaveit #dontworkforme. Was that enough hash tagging????

I am on Twitter, About Me, Stage 32, Facebook, LinkedIn, and more! Not including the three websites I write on and my business' are on. And of course having a Google account pays! I am all over the WWW!!! But I see no end in sight for all this social overrated over hyped live and die for social media. People seem to do the silliest shyt, post everything of where they go and do for everyone to see. If I worked for the government I could find anyone by looking on Facebook!!! Now don't get it twisted! I have gotten caught up in the hype of telling the world via Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Google and a host more where I was!!!! Where I was at and what movie I was soon to watch, where I was eating, who I was visiting and allll of that!!! I stopped that bullshyt! Ohhhh was that tooo direct for you? Well I stopped and for those who do it , do you and have fun doing it.

But I will tell you this, I seem to have (not only just me) those who tie up my time-lines with insistent zealous post. Some positive, and then within a matter of minutes (it seems to me) that same person will come back on angry; telling the world how mad they are and what had just happened! Okaaaay!!! Then the next day this same person is posting how much they love God! Confusing to me??? I mean how do you post like people tweet and flood my time-lines all day everyday with where you eat, cursed out, who died, who needs prayer, who is sick, your vacation, your birthday, car accidents, food, children, drinks, cars, stores, family and friends. Who you cursed out, who you married, who you loved, and where you are on your way to!!! Dammit!!! It s just like TMI on TMZ! Videos of all sorts; funny, good, bad, toxic, racism, hate, abuse and much more are captured and placed on social media and get shared with million and millions of views!!! With a genre and plethora of various comments of what the viewer just witnessed. I mean the stuff you read and see on Twitter and Facebook pulls my damn wig back!!! And let me not forget about those who mope, whine and are depressed and are always tweeting and Facebook posting of their sadness, lonesomeness and break-ups!!! I am tired oh oh oh so tired.....Do we really want to know your family business??? IJS....

Now I do not want to make light of those who are in need of prayer, family is sick, or they may be in the hospital or sick themselves. Someone dies...I understand posting and can feel the pain and hurt what they are experiencing!! But that is what I am telling you!!! I have over 3,700 “friends” on Facebook! I follow 169 people on Instagram, I follow 369 people on my business Twitter account. My writings and work are overall numero uno! On my personal Twitter I follow 300 people. Now with that alone of just those three sites not including the others I am affiliated with. I also get the news, magazines, gossip and TV and network stations.. So I am not ever out of the loop from the “real world” and the world of those I have befriended and followed. The highs!!! The lows!!! The sadness, world news, gossip, good news and the beat and post go onnnn and onnnnnnnnn! I am desensitized and overwhelmed!!!!

How can I grieve, be aghast? Happy, sad and angry in just a matter of seconds???? Why do we have to know everywhere you are and what you are doing alllll the damn time???? Is anything private anymore??? Do we feel the need to compete for the most attention??? And this media sloring... celebrities, rappers, singers, over all entertainers that seem to stay on the blogs and the WWW everyday!!!! Lies, bullshyt and video tapes!! It has seriously taken a course in a direction that have many of us in debt to these social media climates. We can follow our favorite entertainer who is just like “us” and tell “us” where they are at and what they are doing!!

Now if I am out hanging, I am just doing that! Hanging out and not reporting any and every damn thing I do. Noooow if I have a red carpet, fab dinner, great day or evening out! I will post after I leave. Maybe the next day is when I post it. I do not subscribe to the locator on my cell phone letting so many know exactly where the hell I am at!!! Those daze are O .V. E .R over!!!! I love when people share the wonderful memorable things on their profile. Weddings, births etc., etc., But it takes us five to ten minuets per social media to find out when a star, celebrity ie entertainer has died, went to jail, in the hospital, fell out, sighting and all that other garbage that comes with just being “human” yes celebrities and stars have issues and problems. But not like how social media platform blasts us out!!! Nooooo !! The information of these box office draws, reality stars and entertainers get their business blasted allll over the damn world in over thirty five languages!!! Talk about bad news and good news traveling fast!!! I can't right now!!! I really can't!! Are you still with me? Or are you made or nah?

I like so many people out of boredom check my IG, Twitter Facebook, and Google by phone when out and about. Why???? Aren't I out to have a good time?? Do you know how many people I have seen going on their phones and on their Facebook account??? Tooo many to recall! A whoooooole lot! I SMH at this because it is indeed so sad. I also have started breaking this habit down. When I am out and about I enjoy myself and I am NOT on my Facebook, Twitter account 0 o am I making any sense? Like you walk into a coffeehouse and you will see all genders, ages and ethnicity on Facebook, Some actually read email, news and other things buuuuutttt........

I hate it and love it at the same damn time I am telling you!!! And I have to back off a lot from these social media outlets! I was never one to voice my depressions and angst on any media platform! Yes I have asked for prayer once for my daughter. But other than that I do not seek the attention of others pity. I promise I have not ever utilized my media platforms in such away. Because I am a writer and business owner (multi-talented entrepreneur) I feel there should be a certain look for myself and it should not come across NEEDY!! DEPRESSED and most of all people BITCHYN!!!! I do not want to hold court and try and pull in a pity party. Besides should anyone need to know my baby daddy cheated with my aunt and got her pregnant along with me??? And this is some of the crazy shyt I have read that people put out there!!! These dudes posting pics of their body and what is hanging below the belt! We have so many hash tags it is incredible! And I love hash tagging (like I said I love and hate it at the same damn time) Women, or should I say young girls too; posting half naked pics on their Facebook and Instagram. We want followers too! We want likes!! We want attention.

A break, a break, a break. Most times if I go on Facebook is because I have received a push notification on my cell phone. (and why do I need the push notifications for any of these social sites??? You feel what I am saying?? Dammit!!!) I will then check it, and after scroll my news feed, and if it gets overwhelming with some mess, I quickly close the app! #icantrightnow #icantandwont #imnot

So much to pull in and the many vampires that are all over the world utilizing these apps for many reasons! I love what I do! Writing, promoting...I have to promote, and I also have to pay for some of my promotional material if I want it to go to next level. Seen, read, talked about, watched, tweeted, posted, shared. And to make money!! Yes of course! But now we are not only being bombarded and overwhelmed with TMI we are also taking part in the overload!! Enough will never be enough. We have Vines, IG Vines, KiK and ole reliable and never underrated YouTube!! You can find and upload anything there and you gotta love this!! You can get paid if your video gets so many hits!!!! Talk about social media cash cowing it!! But what will you do to get that money? How far will you go? What will you be able to record that just may “jump off”?? The next fight, the next cop shooting and innocent bystander? Maybe even a fight? I mean we all love fights don't we?? Don't we? We seem to look for all the crazy viral off the rip videos online. I love it...and I hate it.

I feel we are on the verge of some off the chain extreme overload soon “coming from another new techie near you!” The next biggest thing! And we will all get on board, try it out, but stick to our faithful loyal social media outlet(s). And if this next one is a real big hit and keeps our attention, well, eh, it'll do and we will play around. Download all these many “fun” apps on our tablets and phone. Get board and trash em soon.

Social media, she is indeed a super bytch in a red dress that sucks the living life out of all her captors!

Toy High 



We all do some things in life that we are truly ashamed of.  And there are also some things that we will say and do that can come up and choke us in our future.  However, I have decided to do this Speak On It!! To those who get stuck in the rut and still ask for help, still ask for pity and DO NOT even pity their own situation and remove themselves from it!

I grew up in a home with a father who was abusive mentally, verbally and physically.  My father was an abusive man mostly towards my mother.  He said slanderous things to hurt me and there were a couple of physical confrontations when I got much older.  I said to myself that I would NEVER succumb to such cruelty by a man!  And that leads me to here….

I absolutely have and hold a great empathy towards women who are in any form of abuse!  It is not good on a woman’s esteem, and neither on their mental nor emotional stability.  However a woman has to know that she is worthy of much more of life; and not a miserable life that she has to come to terms with that within herself.  Each person’s “tired” is different from all of ours.  We are unique and have our own idiosyncracies.  And we each have a different tolerance level.  I get this, I know this I understand this.  However there indeed has to come a time in one’s life (a woman’s) where she has to say ENOUGH!!!!

See I do feel or have any compassion for a woman who vents constantly of a man beating her and abusing her and will not leave.  I am only speaking of the women that have endured abuse and have what I will call “allies” these allies play the EMT role! Every time called they run to the rescue and save the day! A few days at the EMT’s house and the call comes through of “I’m sorry” and they go back and keep repeating the same thing over and over. And some women do this for years!  I have no compassion because it is apparent that they have a support team.  YOU CANNOT MAKE A PERSON LOVE THEMSELF!

I went on a tan gum about physical abuse; however this is not the exact blog of the day.  I just wanted to get your attention!  And so I did!  Before I move on I will tell you that I am not mean spirited and have no compassion.  Because I truly do, because it hurts and rocks my inner core for women to be abused in any form.

I am sure we all know someone, or maybe experienced it ourselves.  Of those who go through the same thing over and over.  Some who seemed to have what Teddy Pendergrass sang, “You got bad luuuuck! That’s what cha got!” Some seem to always be in the middle of some calamity.  And it is never their fault!  It is always someone to blame.  These people I cannot, real not have any empathy for.  I see them on gossip sights, in my life!  On Reality TV (when I watch TV) in movies and real life situations of those around me.  These people throw the best “pity” parties ever!  And some of them are the reasons for all the mad hatter mess they dwell in!  A pool of vomit!  Because I do not have a lot of people in my cipher (I have chosen it this way) I have noticed that these people who have emotional breakdowns, pity parties, bouts of depression and mad temperament issues are because they CANNOT see the light.  And some see the light but have an issue walking through it because that means clearly they will see themselves.  And trust they do!  They just feel better blaming other’s and things before themselves.

The man/woman that has been in a worthless relationship for years and the problems that have been spoken on over and over have never received a remedy.  The problems have persisted and the unhappiness in the relationship has gone way beyond “feeling sorry for” You stay!  And why?  Why do you stay?  For some it has been they don’t want to be alone (but will cheat) being fully responsible financially, or they are simply users.  What need is there to stay in anything toxic?  You know the more you stay in toxic relationships the more toxic you become!  And you have luggage, baggage, walls, gaps and mad bridges!

What about the woman/man that has used and has been so selfish in life?  The ones that have used looks, sex and illegal things in order to have financial gain.  These have and will do so much for the “come up” they have made tons of enemies!  People have nothing good to say about them.  And they have done so much harm that when they get in trouble they have no one to talk to.  And no one will help them! And now they have to find ways to get money and do things that they are very tired of doing. Placing themselves deeper into the cest pool of life.  And they drown and choke in their vomit! I do not pity these pitiful people!

I have no pity for those who will not build themselves up.  Who are weak and need constant help and far removed from growing!  They need constant help and encouragement and they need to keep running into brick walls.  Doing the same dance, same song all the time! These sorts always seem to beg for the attention and it is never ever them!  ‘

Women/men get cheated on all the time.  And couples that are in long relationships that cheat.  Rather than be the male or female to leave and pursue a better life.  The problems and the issues don’t clear up.  They have both gotten very comfortable.  You cannot come to me and complain constantly of how your situation is! You help to create it!  Your eyes have been open!  So you change, because change has not come yet from the other individual.  Get your life!

In this economy that we are all living in today it requires some soldiers!  We have to be stronger now more than ever! I am not saying one should not vent, cry, have a bad day, and get depressed over the current circumstances.  But how much pity and compassion can one show to another individual who has the same drama and circumstances all the time?!  For someone who has to be consistently picked up over and over from seeds they have sewn.  For not realizing they are the cause to their own demise. 

I know what some could be saying, but at this point I could care less!  I am a person who has been around soldiers and babies. And the soldiers inspire me and the babies turn me off!  Those who fear moving forward and are stagnant in life have no encouragement or kind words of uplifting to offer because they are in an emotional crisis.  But we all have to take some form of responsibility not to WEAR out the ones that we cherish with the same buffoonery over and over again! 

How many times does a friend or family member have to sit us down and talk to us to tell us to move on?  When are we going to change our own situations? Why do we bombard our fam and friends with the same rhetoric?  I am tired and way past tired to see so many who want so much compassion and help and leech off of the good energy others have to weigh them down with their burdens.  I am angry that TV has misrepresented abusive situations.  How we tend to believe what we see.  And that if we just hang on in there things will get better.  This is an era where you have to love self first and get your ACT together because the ones who complain and seek to suck all of your energy like a vampire are the ones that will continue to stay at the bottom of the barrel with the rest of the sticky icky crap and bring you down mentally and emotionally with their constant need for pitying.

Toy High





I must say that I am probably a bit past livid right now and my angst level could be very high as I sit behind this screen and write.  However that is why I love having this special page on my site.  This is where I can let it all hang out!! Now first and foremost let me state for the record that I do a lot of the social media.  And I may do some social media that you may not have heard of.  And that is okay, but being an artist and also a business owner and entrepreneur I reach for as many ways as I possibly can to get ME, MY brand out there!  I truly do!  But it is also with great disdain that I am compelled to write today for the haters, dimwits, dummies and the pure silly wabbits that place themselves on the seat of self-righteousness!

I may not agree with a lot of pictures, tweets, comments on Face Book and so forth and so on.  However it strikes me and behooves me that a person(s) would “follow” a person they DO NOT know but how they are compelled to do so because of WHO THEY are.  So of course Instagram, Face Book, Twitter and many other apps give us a glimpse into a celebrity or stars life. Which a lot of us love.  Some of us get that feeling that we are close to them and they have things in common with us.  Though many celebs, singers, rappers, actors cannot get back to all of us. However it does feel good when a celeb “re-tweets” our status or responds to a comment we made.  Oh how we shine and smile and will call our friends and express the love and admiration we felt when this did happen. 

Let me also state for the record that I do “follow” some celebs, celebrity hair stylist, actors, singers etc., etc., and why do I do this?  Well because I am in the entertainment business.  And because of the business that I do run and own that is in part promotions, marketing and advertising.  I really enjoy “following” some celebs, promoters and DJ’s because therefore I am given VIP to a lot of events they promote and will be attending.  So if I am in the city that the celeb, promoter or DJ is at.  I am sure to get on the guest list and attend just so that I can network.  Far from star struck like a lot of people. I know that industry lookey –lous will be there and a plethora of movers and shakers behind the scenes.  And yes, I “follow” some celebs and others to get a glimpse inside where they are, and what they are doing.  So now that I have gotten that out of the way, let me get into to the rooter and the tooter of this blog!

As I go on to my Instagram I and I look at a pic of a pretty young lady.  Who I will say has kicked up a lot of dirt and doesn’t have a great rep only because she allowed cameras in her life to be shown over the world. I will say she is quite the character and she does act out on the show.  I read allllll the many negative comments and harsh words that were thrown at her!  Why?!  Because you feel that there is no other way to tell her how you feel? OK, let me say this.  There are many people I see on a daily and talk to on a daily and I do not feel the need to speak up and say,”I don’t like how you are acting!”  Neither do I say, “I do not like what you are wearing!” Oh and neither do I shout out nasty antidotes of crassness!  Nope!  And we alllll see many things that we all would like to say something to.  We know of our family, friends, co-workers that are cheating and doing foul things.  Do we find the need to express those opinions on social media?  Well let me say that some who are messy and unattractive will do so.  However as a rule I was taught that you stay out of other people’s business!  Meaning that if you see something that you don’t like such as cheating.  You DO NOT get in the middle of that.  Now if you are a very close family member or very close friend and YOU feel the need to step in and say something.  Of course it is your choice to do so and I would say if you feel comfy doing so then do so.  But all these haters and dislikers that “follow” people they don’t like just to throw stones and say hateful antidotes to that person is WRONG!  Look I see pics, sentences, paragraphs and much more of these people.  Some not even celebs!  But let me also state for the record.  I say nothing under their pic; I don’t feel the need to tweet, fuss, and throw darts of hatred.  You are doing you and doing what makes you happy!  But let me also state, DO NOT follow me if you DO NOT like what I post on any of my websites or social media just to bring me down!  Come on!  And don’t follow me if you don’t like me!  What is the point in all of that?!

I am personally notorious for “unfollowing” people on any of my social media.  And also ‘unfriending” people as well on my social media profiles.  I tired of some of the postings I witness.  For me I do not want to see the constant profane language.  Someone throwing SHADE at a “friend” that they know will check what was recently posted because the both of them follow each other.  Or the infamous tagging one can do when they post something.  Which you can do on majority of the social media outlets.  For me the constant venting, ranting and raving.  The hateful words, the negativity, the random bitterness of who they are and what they do and where they go.  Of course everyone has freedom of speech!  Oh yes of course we all do and that it was I love about what I do! However I do not prescribe to the endless negativity and neither do I want to be flooded with porn pics of women and men constantly.  For those who are into this, I say enjoy and do you to the fullest!  But this is about me and how I feel! I do not want to be tagged in any BS on any social media!  Keep me out of it!  And if I am following someone that may post something I do not like or a pic that is not what I feel attractive.  I am not going to slam the person by being crass or rude.  Some people I “follow” are seriously off the chain!  And I expect them to post what they do.  However if it gets to be too much then I do what I do and “unfollow”  

I get a bit peeved and perturbed at the mudslinging because I have actually gone on some of these people’s personal profile and can instantly tell they are far from angels and have the audacity to speak they way that they do!  I say get a fukn life!  I say get your life right and focus on what you need to do and get right in your life! I say stop taking the time out of your life and trying to be PC and you are not!

Listen I am not saying that we are not all judgmental because we alllll are!  We see and hear things that we disagree with all the time!  We all have our own opinions.  And truth be told I have my opinions of a lot of things I see and hear and don’t agree with.  However this is how I look at it.  We all in this world have a say in what we feel.  However to follow people and discredit them over and over and over to humiliate them is not acceptable!  If you do not like a bully then you stay away from bullies!  If you don’t like children then you don’t come or go around and even hang around people who have children.  Makes perfect sense to me!  Listen I have a few people in my life that do things that I do not indulge in.  I say birds of a feather flock together.  And some do and some don’t.  However is it really important for us all to have something harshly negative of individuals we do not like and then want to be cruel and self righteous?  Come on people.  And the ironic thing is…when I go onto Instagram, Twitter and other social medias.  One person will make a crass comment and then a person that sees it will say just what I am writing about. “Why are you following if you don’t like her?”  So many people complained when Bush Jr. was re-elected for a second term.   And when the people who put him back in office that had children in the armed services and they were dying overseas!  Ohhhh now it was a problem!  Now you wanted to protest and act an azz and get plain ole indignant!  Noooooo you followed him, you wanted him in office.  You believed him.  But now that sons and daughters were being captured, killed and coming home mentally and physically beaten.  Many protestors came out of the woodworks! But you all knew the first four years in office what he was all about yet you continued to support the man!

So here is my beef, you know who they are and what they represent when you started following.  You had an opportunity to see all sorts of postings.  You viewed the pics, how they talked, and the way this person presented themselves in the media.  What was going to change?  Were they going to just change for you over night because you left a nasty word on their profile?  Maybe they relish in you giving them the attention that you do.  Maybe they like all the negative things that are said and scoff and laugh at you while they laugh going to the bank.  I have encountered a few haters in what I do.  But guess what I am not as famous as the ones they all “follow” and love to follow because they are all nosey as hell!

But I love those who follow me!  Hahaha!  Yeap I do! And keep following me!  And if you don’t like following me then stop!  Because I am me and will stay me and continue to be me and do me in all my glory.  I can say this once my fame does spread and I do become Americas most wanted and others get nosey.  There will more than likely be some that will have something harsh to say.  I am so sure!  But until that miraculous meticulous majestical magical moment occurs!  Stop all that unnecessary hating!


Toy High




Right now as I write this I have a huge angst!! Tired, irritated and bothered by so much. Normally I try to be Ms. Positivity but I have seen and experienced so much for the past year that it has been mad crazy! Of course we all know that there are so many that are struggling trying to make it. Those who are just trying to pay bills, survive, eat or even get a job. Mind you that people are placing themselves in precarious situations in order to make ends meet. Some people are selling their souls in order to survive. And the angst from what I see is those who need a job and are not looking because they are co-dependent on others. While I see some who are in tears, worry and under fire because they cannot get a job and are looking for a job! Who in the hell said that the employment levels have risen in the U.S.? Really? Have they? Let me tell what I see or have experienced in regards to the job market. Especially to those who are on the executive level in the game. They are being offered employment with insurance companies or collection companies. And I indeed love this one “Account Executives” which basically is the new for “sales representative” So now most of these jobs want you to sale or collect. And some of these jobs are not paying you a salary or by the hour! Which means that you literally have to hustle! So if you are not a smooth sales person then you will find yourself working and “hustling” hard and can't get over, or up and out because you don't have the right “lingo” or enough persuasion skills. Uh this is utter chaos to me! Now pardon me, how do you have these type of jobs when the economy is so bad? How? You want to collect when prices rise and maybe someone has lost a home. Maybe someone had to move back home because they can't handle it all alone? Are these truly good jobs?

If jobs have gotten better and more are being created I indeed cannot see it! I don't see it because a lot of employers are paying less. And those that pay good are hard to get! I am in no way disrespecting the president. Because no matter who the president was over the states it was going to be hard on that individual because of what the former president did to the country! So now a lot of us truth be told; White, Black, Asian (all Asian ethnic background) Latino and ethnic mixtures in between are on some form of welfare! Please believe that! And a lot of us are unemployed! Our current President has extended so much money to help us all from not killing, robbing and committing mad chaos in the world and on each other just to survive! And I know that you may shake your head at this, but it is so very true. Is there crime in our cities and towns? Very much so it is! I concur to the fullest! In other words hell yeah! But just imagine no welfare, no unemployment extensions, shelters, food banks, clothing assistance, SSI, disability or disaster relief!!! Talk about chaos and mass hysteria in the world!! I am not sure if any of you know that when hurricane Katrina hit there were people that came home and found others sleep on their floor. Or have raided someones refrigerator just to eat and not steal anything but food! I have heard of so many wild and way out stories! And yet and still there are many suffering from that devastation and lost! Now add this recession we are all in. Have been in way past a decade now.

When you have many Americans of all backgrounds and ethnic groups having to dummy down a resume, take lower paying jobs to feed themselves or family. I see more for rent signs than I see listings for jobs. Now maybe the jobs that are hiring that I don't and many work in. Fast food, retail, and cooks. And other jobs that are paying minimum wage or just above it.

I at one time frowned upon men and women going back home to live with their parents. Especially men! Why can you not live on your own? I have come across a sleuth of men that have gone back home to their parents, family member, friend or significant other. Now those who had to leave their significant others went to family members homes. I am speaking of men that are from their twenties to their fifties! And some of these men or women parents are on SSI or disability! So while they are barely making it now their expenses go up because of the family member moving in or whomever they are assisting. And of course if we are blessed to have someone come in that does help pay the bills that you are not trying to kick out because they are not helping! Let me step back and take a break, because I have worn myself out already!

The economy is hard on everyone, for me I see so many celebs and a lot of out of work actors. Performers of all kind have taken a back seat in this economy and are having a hard time making ends and are constant touring of some sort to keep bills paid. This Speak On It is not for the super wealthy or rich. But even they are feeling this rash of economic change themselves!

So it hurts me to see people who do not even try to do for themselves with whatever we have here to assist us and take from those who have and are striving to make it. There is no method to their madness and their madness to their methods are all misconstrued! I am also livid at the people who have had opportunity after opportunity and just now are trying to do better and have lived their lives with no ambitions, goals nor work ethics majority of their lives. And now they are in deeper need. Is it fair that those who are striving have to be constantly giving holiday bonuses (assisting with money) to keep them and their families going? What part of the game is this? When do we grow up and see things for what they are, or should I say have been for quite sometime now.

Again close your eyes and imagine a world where we are under rule, mass hysteria. Where they have to the Army, Navy and troopers to guard and have us living under “Marshall Law” so even though we are all striving and going through it. The madness to the method who are making ends meet and hoping that ends will meet are in deep thought and have a method of what is needed to be done. But still it is quite disturbing and maddening due to the angst and severe emotional distress.

Once again I am livid at our current situation at the lazy that don't see nor pay attention to the goings ons of the world. For those who are mad at the wrong thing and the wrong people. Not appreciative to what they have and who they have. How money is taking away from those who love. How selfishness has grown deep and rampid. How crime has increased and restlessness plagues our cities and towns.

Toy High





I am one of those people (If it is a group) that is so elated the presidential race is now over! As you should know for those that read the “Speak On It” that I hold no punches and speak on what I feel.  My opinions on any subject are never ever inclusive to what the masses feels or thinks.  Though there may be some that may agree with or what I feel.

Now I feel more than ever we have stepped back to a day and time where slavery has just ended and African-Americans are still fighting for equality!  Like the rights to have and own businesses, careers, homes, cars and live and dine wherever they want to.  Of course when you look at the rise of African-Americans from the very moment slavery was abolished.  As a culture and group they have come very far.  However in 2012 it seems as the years continue to pass more and more white people have shared their dismay and discontentment with people such as African-Americans.  I am not going to go through every episodic scene, but I will give some examples that we have witnessed.  Coaches in the NFL and NBA have made some very shady and crass comments.  There has been a sleuth of talk show host and a plethora of radio host, host of shows, politicians, celebrities that have made negative and racist comments against the very race of African-American people.  Not that as a people we don’t know that racism still exist in America.  I just feel and in my words, “Get over it and move on!” Too much going on in the world today to have and hold on to so much self-hatred!  Yes I said self!  Only because at the beginning and ending of the day we are all human!

Now as I have spoken on how white people are racist. (Of course there are other cultures that don’t care for African-Americans) As I have traveled and spoke to African-Americans I also hear the sting of racism in their voices too.  Their hate for the “white race” Could it be because how and what they have experienced in their life that has made them “racist”? Or were they raised as some white Americans to loathe and despise the white race as some white people have been?  Who knows because I hadn’t dug that deep.  But from what I see is that there are some racist people on both sides of the spectrum.  And right is right and wrong is wrong no matter what race, creed, culture or ethnicity does it.  I have had many conversations with men and women that like to pin point on how “men are dogs” and “women are bitches” really?  I find this degrading and insensitive!  Why you ask? Because at the beginning of the day there are men and women that are selfish, mean, cheaters, liars, thieves, murderers, haters!  No one sex is worse than the other.  So I feel the same exact way when it comes to whites and African-Americans.  No race or culture is worse than the other.  They share what we all share in our community! Psssst….let me mention that there are more white people on government assistance than our culture.  Just and FYI before I move on.  And also a proven fact!

So now let me get into the meat of this race for the presidential position. Now let me say this, I honestly feel that if Obama did not win it would have been an up rise and racial (African-American) riot! Yes it would have! For those who experienced the Rodney King and Martin Luther King (ironic they have the same last names hmmm) most of the economically challenged areas in Detroit, Los Angeles and Chicago saw devastation from being walked upon and ignored.  Battered and bruised mentally and emotionally from racial slurs and deeds.  How do you not throw the book at the police officers that were recorded by pulling a man out of his car and beating him in front of a camera?  Ahhhh where they do that at?  Oh my bad in America!  Only in America?  No!  There are racial tensions in a lot of countries but I will stick to this great land of ours! This racial uprising was a people who were and are still tired of the social injustices that they have incurred along with their family members before them.  If OJ would have been convicted there would have been a racial riot.  Trust me people were on standby and ready to act up and turn their city out!  The judge knew this along with the “powers that be” so he was given a plea of “not guilty” Was he guilty?  Only OJ and God know that.  If you are asking me my opinion about it.  I say yes he was guilty.  OJ had some involvement in the killings of his wife and Ron Goldman.

This was the most racist, spit flying acting up “trial” yeap I said trial that I am sure the world has ever seen.  Romney and his cohorts were clear that they did not WANT a black man to be president for a second term.  There were too many Romney supporters that let it be quite known that they did not like the president and that they didn’t care for African -Americans.  However there was a sleuth of African-Americans that spoke some very provocative words against white people too!  Why in this presidential race was race an issue?  Why was it not the issues at hand?  I feel the issues of jobs and healthcare were really thrown under the bus and the main issue was “Aaarrghh We do not want this black mutha fuckn nigga to be the president again! How the fuk did he become president in the first place? I hate them lazy bastards!” And then you have the opposing end, “These white mutha fuckas don’t give a fuk about us! They kept us in slavery.  White people are some racist bastards!  We see what they think of us all the time!  We get no justice or breathing room!  Fuck them!” I ask you what is the difference? White racist or black racist? How do you fight for equality amongst the masses when you now have “people” being very vocal of their distain dislike for African-Americans and other cultures?  And why is it that African-Americans are picked on the most?  I know that answer but will not go into full detail about it at this time. 

Am I a fan of Romney? Nope not at all!  Neither was I a fan of the Bushes! Also I am not a fan of politics! Why you ask? Lol because in the land of the law and the world there are too many catch 22’s in regards to any and everything.  I and you live in a world that is meant to be abnormally normal with its oxymoronic values! On one hand you can say whatever you like because “we” have the freedom of speech.  Which works well for me right here and now.  And then on the other hand you can’t say what you really want due to backlash and it might just might get you placed behind bars! Huh? Now does that make sense? Nope not at all!

I also told people over and over who were pulling for Obama that he would win and we all needed to get out and vote!  The overwhelming support Obama had from rappers, singers, actors, comedians and loyal supporters who knew that if Romney was elected as president “African-Americans would be picking cotton” really? How so?  A sleuth of African-American people who have risen from adversity and have made their way up social and injustice just all of a sudden get everything taken away and now are working and plowing fields?  Naw it wouldn’t be that easy.  I can understand how this feeling and thoughts would come in the minds of African-Americans.  But not picking cotton!  I saw a sleuth of Tweets, Instagram pics and pics and slanderous sayings on Facebook.  I took no part in it.  And what will also be surprising is, I didn’t vote!  Why?  Because it is not the “popular” vote that gets a president elected.  It is the electoral votes that get him elected.  And most of the voters that go to the poles are considered to be the “popular” vote.  Not only that, the cabinet members on Obama’s team are Republican! Hmmm…. In the words of Arsenio Hall “Things that make you go hmmm.” As far as I was concerned here my vote wouldn’t hurt nor help Obama being reelected for a second term!  And I didn’t want to vote because he was of the African-American persuasion!  Not at all! And the crazy thing and yet not crazy was that a lot of African-American people voted for that and that alone.  Oh and to keep welfare going.  Food stamps or Snaps in some states.  There were too many of my culture and race that didn’t know his true stance on war, jobs, healthcare, taxes and much more.  Should one vote for the content of character or the color of skin? My people my people some of them were doing just that.  Just as the white people wanted to get Obama out of office because he was African-American! See my point?

I will admit that I was taken aback when Romney made his snide comments.  And his ignorance did show up it seemed too many times.  For me if I would have voted it would have been for Obama.  Not because he was African-American.  But because the man has common sense unlike Bush and Romney.  I shake my head at the thoughts that had come out.  The way they speak and how they cannot speak.  And their plain belligerence on so many issues. 

Has Obama done a lot while being in office?  Yes he has!  And I love him for that!  Would Romney have placed Americans (not just African American) in precarious situations?  Indeed!  Look at what Ronald Reagan, George Bush Sr. and George Bush Jr. have done to terrorize our country and make things worse because they don’t have the gift of good sense to make it right!  No one man can change the ideas and feelings of America!  Neither can he fix all of the wrongs that have been done while there was a president in office who was only interested in being one to support and save “the family business” at the end of the day, a lot of politics and things done in America are done by a higher being are group! I wonder how the Bushes oil and opium business is doing now? And why the hell did Obama find Osama and Bush couldn’t?  That is another story… ha ha…Let me stop.

So do we have the right president in office?  Is he a puppet?  Will he continue to do the right thing?  Will he continue to be on the right path?  Will he?  These are questions that we do not have the answer to and just assume that it will be done.  So now that the dirt and mud blood swinging is over (not really) maybe the racist white people who have been acting out because Romney was not elected can settle down and chill out!  Nooot! So my last question to you is….Are we all (or most of us) racist?

Toy High


 SPEAK ON IT!!!!  



It has been awhile since I last came at you I spoke on the state of hip-hop.  But now I am coming at you about the reality of reality TV and the many “Stars” that has come out of this plague of misfits that now live in the REAL world.  I will be honest and not tell a lie yes I have viewed and still view some reality TV.  Why? Call it sucked in, but I will get to that later.   

I stopped watching “All My Children” and “One life To Live” a looong time ago! When I felt I was addicted.  It was like a drug to see what Erica Kane and Dorian Haywood were going to do next.  I may have taken this back too far and some may not be familiar with those characters from those two soap operas.  Enter now my point, there are a lot of people who DO NOT know these new fangled wanna be reality TV stars either! 

When “The Real World” first came on the air and hit MTV I was on it allll day!  I loved it!  We had nothing like it!  But now we have too much of it.  We have too many shows about too many people’s lives and there is no “good television” anymore.  Now let me stop and say this in my dismal of reality TV. First of all I am no hater!  Get your money!  And the real deal is that reality TV does keep a lot of people in business and working.  A lot of families are eating and paying bills.  Hence Camera men, producers, PA’s, Executive producers and networks of course.  But these people who may star in these shows get a salary too!  Of course the ones who have reoccurring “roles” or “appearances” every season the show airs.

Now I feel reality TV has made a stretch when we get shows like, “Pregnant In Heels” and oh my favorite! ( It’s really not) “Swamp People!” We are making shows about little girls in pageants, pageant mothers, finding the next super star! Since American Idol we have had at least four spin offs from that.  Too many shows on dancing, losing weight and looking for “Americas Next Top Model!” (are they really the next supermodel?)  Oh and all the many housewife shows.  Dog whisperer, training your pet!  Okay! Who will be original and come up with something else besides reality TV?  I ‘m just saying!  I am not a big TV watcher.  And before I made my mission and journey back to Atlanta Georgia I had OD’d on TV at my parent’s home. See my mother’s Computer was down and here I am in the boonies with nothing to do but talk here and there and watch Direct TV.  Which let me thumb through all the channels and see how many reality TV think you can dance call the dog and start drama I married and have seven wives and who is the bachelors wife I am a bad girl and a bad bride?  Did somebody run out of call letters or what? (Wiping my forehead and taking a deep breath while shaking my head) After viewing so many shows and literally being bombarded I was numb!

Now here is what's stumped me. All the many stars who have actually worked to get where they are today do not get as much pub as these reality TV stars.  You can go on the many blogs and websites of all the networks and read what is going on with them.  The gossip columnist loves the antics these people pull and all of the backbiting and tongue lashing that cast members have one another.  I am not saying that life doesn't have any drama in it, but this is why we tune in isn’t it?  To see what is going to happen next! 

Now here’s the thing these people are now considered celebrities! They are now in the limelight and have fans! Can you believe this?  They actually have fans that love what they do…okay let me back up for a minute so you can really feel me on this one.  You come up with a show, you ask for pictures ie head shots (because in reality what person picked for a reality TV show would have head shot pictures?) and people to send in videos to “audition” to be in this TV show. So now we have this show and these are “regular” people that either are uppity, extremely urban, white trash, rich so forth and so on now competing to get air time.  Their fifteen minutes of fame.  They are placed in situations so that they can act out, and either the public will love to hate them or hate to love them.  And here is the crazy part; most of these shows have reunions!  So now you get to sit while all these “reality celebrities” talk about the show and what was said and how they felt about the people on the show. Overnight it seems that these people are household names instantaneously! Their new fans want to touch them, meet them, get their autographs and take pictures with them! Wowzers! Are you serious?  Ummm, what movie did you just act in?  Oh noooo it wasn’t a movie?  Okaaay what was it? Oh you were on a reality TV show! Oh so now you are a star! Isn’t that something?

These people now it seems put stars and there lives of drama that are played out in front of us seem small.  And get this, now the paparazzi looks for the reality TV “Stars” so they can catch them doing whatever it is they do.  Could I do reality TV?  Sure I could!  Not because it would be drama, fights, messy women and messy men.  No so that I can be myself! And like the rest get a check!

 Are these people really being themselves?  Are they acting out?  Sure they are!  They are “acting” out in front of cameras to get your attention.  They need it!  They want to be somebody to you and to themselves.  Now here is my major point.  These people are some of them begin to change because they have been on TV!  Is this a joke or what? I mean for those who are on shows and it is mostly the same “actors” and “actresses” these people instantly have “Access Hollywood” They rub shoulders with the elite! Their lives are shown on TV to millions of viewers.  The way the show may or may not be edited. Who they are does truly show.  Their careers are in demand!  They are wanted for appearances.  They are praised and loved!  

I am simply making a point to you. So many shows that are on and it seems as if to me that is all smoke and mirrors and US the viewing public that everyday there is drama going on in our lives.  I am sure that the scenes that are edited for television are the scenes that have the most drama.  I am just perturbed that these people are regarded “stars” and they have now made a living or making a living in reality TV!  Now there are some that have truly built their own career way before there was reality TV.  These few in the pot of reality TV I can appreciate a bit more and have a better respect for them.  Some are singers, songwriters, producers, rappers.  We are now given an open door of how they live.  A little bit because there are some things of course that is kept out of our viewing eyes. 

So if Beyonce and Jay-Z did a reality show would I view it? I sure would because I am a Jay-Z fan! And Jay-Z has established himself in the industry.  But would Jay-Z need to do reality TV? No!! What would be the reason? Could the networks pay Jay-Z and Beyonce enough money to do it is the question.  And in my world I would say no!  But that is the difference right?  You can pay some from $300,000 a year salary and other's $1,200 and up an episode to put their lives upfront close and personal.  What do you pay a huge star and episode?  A million?  I’m just saying!

Let me bring up the Kardashians!  No real claim to fame at alllll!! What their daddy was a lawyer who represented high profile clients with mad money to burn?  So what Robert Kardashian rubbed shoulders with heavy hitters and stars?  His daughters are they actors, rappers, models, singers, clothing designers.. um nothing! So now we have Kim hanging out with Paris Hilton and since Paris was in the media a lot. People asked, "Who is she?" So Kim is now getting fifteen minutes of fame.  Now she is out there rubbing shoulders, she dates Ray J; Sex tape comes out, and now she is famous!  I am missing some things in between.  Now the Kardashians have a store in Palm Springs.  Kim is getting mad attention, Kris is now a pimp, oops manager momerger and she leaks this sex tape and sees that she can make money off her children!! Now fast forward to what we have gotten from a bunch of women and a family who had no real claim to fame.  And build an empire!  How many shows have come from the Kardashians? I am still not sure of what Kim is famous for! Yes her mom gets her gigs…and that is questionable.  She is a spokesperson?  Model?  What?  Does she own a couple of clothing stores?  Yes! But does this make her famous besides the fact that she has hung out and screwed some celebrities…NFL…NBA…rappers….you feel me now? But hey..Who am I? Right?  To hate on her or anyone for that matter that have taken reality TV and made a name for themselves and has ventured into other unique business ventures.  Besides Kim has enough money to stuff in four Cal-King mattresses with mad money to spare! Get your money!  But again let me bring you to reality!  Kim’s reality is having paparazzi follow her around stalking her all the time!  And the other reality is she is not a star of any sort! 

I am sure there are a sleuth of talented people who have drama and life issues that would blow our wigs back and deserve a show.  Some people that are full of humor and their lives are hilarious!  They could use some money I am sure.  But what happened to those who were popular, and I mean real popular when they were on reality TV?  Are their lights crushed now because they are no longer in the spotlight? You can go on any cable channel online, especially VH1, MTV and BET and click on shows and see all the many reality TV shows they have had on their roster.  Shaking my head at this..And if you don’t see the show then you have a search engine!

The reality of my reality is that most of these people that have careers already on the grind use these shows of course as catalyst to boost public recognition.  No problem.  But at what cost can you separate your life from life?  How do they really see you?  What do they really want from you?  When this plays out what will you do? What will be needed to place you back in the limelight?  Guaranteed if ones name is mention on certain levels of celebritisms these names would not be recognized.  And if so, it is buffoonery!  I am sure there is enough reality on all cultural levels that we have seen and we have said,”Damn!” Italians, Jews, gays, lesbians, whites and African Americans and those in between have been embarrassed by the shaking of their heads at the shenanigans that abrupt on these shows!

I can’t really recall any man or woman pushing me to the edge of wanting to pull hair and bust someone across the head with a bottle, chair or plate!  That is far from who I am.  And I don’t think I would want America to know all the many men that may come in and out of my life, or that I use to strip.  Not that I can’t be upfront about my past.  That has nothing to do with it.  I just want my past twisted up and made to look ugly.  Which it can easily be done. The truth is all of us have experienced some hilarious antics and wild antics without having a camera following people around and inside of their homes.  Is this great TV?  I say no.  Long to me are gone the days of sitcoms.  I hear more people young and old talking of reality TV more than sitcoms and movies!  And they gossip and have opinions on each of the “characters” on these shows that are just living and being themselves. This is why I say, “Where is my check?” When there are more people talking about reality TV than that new movie that Spike Lee or Denzel Washington starred in.  Well Houston we have a damn problem!

So I end on this note, we have enough reality in our daily lives in this day and time.  Housing, utilities, food, clothing, gas, personal, employment, money reality.  Did I give you enough? Is reality TV a drug?  Are there junkies? Yeap just like crack heads! Is reality TV an escape? Why sure it is and they have lured and pulled a lot of people in on just the reality of others dramatic reality to the level of where “we” the viewers have empathy and can comprehend.  It is television that is purposely made to dumb us down.  What can we learn or do we learn from these programs? Not a damn thing! In my Jay-Z voice from the American Gangster CD “It’s only entertainment!”

Toy High






Okay, let me ask you this….when was the last time you saw an ad campaign encouraging teenagers to protect themselves from being an unwed mom?  Don’t worry I’ll wait..(Jeopardy music in the background) Okay times up!! You haven’t …hmmm wonder why?  Well I will give you my opinion and my opinion only.  Why in the world do we need any?  Why do we need anyone or any non-profit organization, OB-Gyn doctors telling young girls not to have unprotected sex and bring babies in this world?  Well, (excuse me while I sip from my truth cup…ahhhh feels good) Because there is no longer such a thing as role models.  And if there are not any reasons to believe in them why have them?  And long gone are the days of just teenagers having babies unwed but adult women! …hmmm..


Now I can run a loooong list of actors, singers, rappers, actresses and actors that have had babies out of wedlock.  Marriage is the last thing that anyone seems to want.  (let me back up and not catergorize-some) And the hippest trip in America is if you want a baby you to can be a baby daddy or mommy! Awwww how cute and hot is that? Very hot.  Solange Knowles, Halle ?Berry, Angelina Jolie, Courtney Kardashian (and she is pregnant with her second child) I can go on and on and on at how so many women have had babies and not married.  Now hold up!  These are not young girls or teenagers! No, no, no, no!  These are young women and young ladies! When I pulled and looked up statistics a lot of WOMEN were in their forties!  Hmmm…and some were in their thirties and late twenties! And also all the many many reality TV shows that have women who have children and were never married and are busting babies out like hit records!! Uh jeesh the irony f it all! 


Long gone are the days of morals and doing things in good taste. I know that we have stretched this each year and each decade. However it is more common to shack up, to have babies and not wait until you marry. It is also common for women to raise children by themselves.  And this one is a new yet oldie at the same time.  Men are now raising their children because the mothers who had the babies don’t want to be bothered anymore.  Rather that is due to drug abuse, running around and hanging out, new boyfriend or whatever.  (hitting the top of microphone) Is this thing on?  I am just saying are some of these (young and older) recognizing that you have to raise and take care of children?  I guess not.  That children are a responsibility and once you have children you can’t give them back?  Or can you? Oh yeah you can, to the fathers that step up to the plate.  Oh and grandmothers!! Yeah they work real well. And if you have money give them to the nannies to raise!  Yeah that’s a good one!


Oh and the many men who are pro-ballers, singers who know that a woman will be open to lay up and have un-protective sex just so that she can have the grand and wonderful opportunity of getting pregnant.  Eddie Murphy, Jamie Foxx, Mel Gibson, Brad Pitt, Sean Combs, Robert Deniro.  And again this list is super long.  Is there any damn justice here?  I mean really? How can a mother or father for that matter tell their child how important it is NOT to have children when they are just a child themselves or that it is better to have children after you have finished college and settle down and get married.  And hold on!  I am not saying that marriage is indefinite or anything of that nature.  And that it will make the mom and dad stay together to raise the child!  It just gives you some damn dignity!


I am no angel here, far from it.  I had two children out of wedlock.  But I cut the cord, the cycle and I cut the disease at the root with my children!  I will not go into how I did this.  However, I am not a grandmother and proud to say it!  My daughters are in their mid twenties and there has not been any mishaps. They are single, live your life! Were you not in the same house I was in and did you see mommies struggles with you and how my marriage broke up and he didn’t hold his end up?   I am in my mid forties and I made my mother a granny grandmother when she was forty-one. Not cool, hot or sexy about a woman being in her prime and being a grandmother.  I now of women that are grandmothers in their thirties because they were having babies at thirteen and fourteen!  Was I given the talk?  Sure I was!  But I was not given any tools!  No birth control, no trips to a doctor to discuss it and no brochures or books.  My mother said, “Don’t do it!”

How do we stop abortions? How do we stop women from having babies and condoning being a baby mom or baby dad? How do we cry out to the world that using protection is not just preventing one from getting AIDS or STD’s?  Because that seems to be the only way we have been seeing campaigns on having protective sex.  And guess what?  Those ads have dwindled down along with commercials.  Maybe in countries where millions and millions of people are dying and the AIDS rate is at an astronomical high. 
The top twenty-five cities and states that have aids in our great US of A….

1 Miami, FL 37.2 64,573
2 Baton Rouge, LA 30.6 4,565
3 Jacksonville, FL 29.1 7,292
4 New York, NY-NJ-PA 27 223,508
5 Washington, DC-VA-MD-WV 26.6 37,916
6 Columbia, SC 23.5 3,949
7 Memphis, TN-MS-AR 23.3 6,018
8 Orlando, FL 23.3 10,457
9 New Orleans-Metairie-Kenner, LA 23 9,941
10 Baltimore-Towson, MD 22.8 23,875
11 Jackson, MS 22.2 2,881
12 San Juan-Caguas-Guaynabo, PR 20 24,126
13 Lakeland, FL 18.9 2,210
14 Atlanta-Sandy Springs-Marietta, GA 18.7 27,313
15 San Francisco, CA 18.3 44,422
16 Tampa-St Petersburg-Clearwater, FL 17.4 13,135
17 San Antonio, TX 12.3 5,892 San Diego-Carlsbad-San Marcos, CA 16 14,723
18 Charlotte-Gastonia-Concord, NC-SC 15.7 4,123
19 Houston-Baytown-Sugar Land, TX 15.1 29,556
20 Charleston-North Charleston, SC 14.4 2,423
21 Raleigh-Cary, NC 14.3 2,632
22 Nashville-Davidson-Murfreesboro, TN 13.7 4,570
23 Fresno, CA 13.5 1,829
24 Cape Coral-Fort Myers, FL 13.2 2,034
25 Columbus, OH 12.9 3,966

Now apparently it is not worth a lot (not all) teenagers, young ladies, or women  have protected sex if they are trying to hook a man, or “just want a baby because now I feel it’s time” Let me ask you does any STD or AIDS virus discriminate?  Take your time to answer that one, don’t worry I’ll wait!...(Jeopardy music playing….buzzer goes off!)  Times up!  The answer is no!  So I’m asking, rich, famous, middle-class, poor and barley making it don’t cha know get STD’S and AIDS!  Are you kidding me?  Woooow I didn’t know this information! So you mean to tell me it is okay, it is hot to get the dropsies and drop it like it’s hot and let it down low?  What are we promoting here? 

Picture this, can you please?  Let’s do a beautiful and wonderful spread in a fashion slash entertainment magazine.  There are seven women, dressed to the nines in designer clothes and shoes make-up is flawless.  And all seven of these women are just smiling and gushing with pride because they just had their babies. Below their group pic it says, “Being a single mom at any age is hot and a beautiful thing to do” Can you picture that?  Close your eyes come on and envision some of the stars and celebs that have had babies.  We should get them all together and do it!  Just like Nike!  Do it!

Let me tell you something from the bottom of my closed womb.  (laughing out loud) I don’t and never have condoned my being pregnant and single.  Meaning my first child at nineteen and my second at twenty and I got married three moths after my second was born. Never once glorified any celebrity of any sort having a baby out of wedlock.  Yes it is your choice, your body, your decision.  Of course it is!  But you cannot reach and teach the masses of young people who do look up to you not to do something and you turn around and do it.  Can an alcoholic or drug addict say to someone don’t do this and are high or drunk?  I have spoken to many, and of course not all have gone down that path.  But their parents said don’t get high while they were high, don’t drink, don’t get any girl pregnant, don’t come home pregnant to their daughters.  Don’t have sex, protect yourself, and guess what? From my statistics 70% have done what they were shown and told not to do….

I don’t watch too much TV, but I noticed that Trojan has a commercial campaign for lovers now. Some new lubricated gel that blows your wig back for men and women to get you extra wet and extra sensations for the man and the woman while having sex!  This gel is the B-all end! Not once does it say be sure to use a condom, nope. Not once does it say for adults only..nope… It just says if you wana ride and ride right this is a must have like those shoes you have been wanting!! Aha! So get it, try, do it and enjoy! I am not throwing daggers at the commercial.  I am sure, well nooo I can’t be sure. But I assume it is a wonderful product but where is the sense of responsibility here?

While teenage pregnancy has decreased it is still prominent in our world. These are the top ten cities and states that have the highest teen pregnancy rate.  I am glad that it has decreased.

1. Neveda (113)

2. Arizona (104)

3. Mississippi (103)

4. New Mexico (103)

5. Texas (101)

6. Florida (97)

7. California (96)

8. Georgia (95)

9. North Carolina (95)

10. Arkansas (93)

However I am sad that women who are in the public eye are having babies to get “paid” (some not all) and the image it gives.  But then again maybe as a collective whole we are noo longer concerned what society thinks anymore.  That is another story.  So mothers and fathers how can you teach your children not to have babies when they see child custody orders, child support cases, many celebrities having babies?  We just hope that the few that are listening can pass it on.  Because right now it’s reaaal hot to have a baby and not be married at any age.. I’m just saying….


Toy High


First let me say this am I a 100% lover of a variety of music. And of course there are some music genres that I don't particularly care for, just as a lot of people. However my true heart of music is more on the mellow genre. Example; pop music (some) soft rock, R&B, lounge music, Contemporary jazz, neo-soul, grunge(some) and the list goes on. I also enjoy rap or hip-hop. Let me go back a bit so that I can give you some history of when and where I fell in love with hip-hop. Due to fact that I was born in 1966 I was quite young when hip-hop or rap hit the scene. Not like some who were born in the seventies, eighties and nineties and rap is now considered a staple and excepted by the world. Rap was a statement of young men that had “something to say” and actually the first record of what was actually considered rap but not labeled a rap song went as far back as 1968 “HERE COMES THE JUDGE” 1968 a silly song that was performed by Pigmeat Markham. But I am going back too far. The first recorded song that was a commercial success was “Rappers Delight” Performed by the Sugar Hill Gang. They took the track form the group Chic “Good Times” and placed their fun lyrics on it. Now that song came out in 1979 and at that time I was in the seventh grade and thirteen years old. It was a song that was a hit in skating rinks. And was played over and over and never seemed to play out.

Of course I loved this song, and now we welcome in the East Coast! And most of the songs that came out were from rapping duos or groups that surfaced from New York. Afrika Bambaataa came hard with “Planet Rock” And that was a commercial hit in the African-American community. I enjoyed this song as well. It was the mid eighties that my love for hip-hop grew with such groups or rappers like; Heavy Dee, Public Enemy, Tribe Called Quest, Erik B. & Rakim, Boogie Down Productions “Criminal Minded” De la Soul and the list goes on and on and yes I am missing a lot of wonderful rappers. Even when rap had now crossed over with people like Jay-Z, Wu-Tang, Method Man, Redman I was feeling some of these songs. But when the late eighties had come and we had hit the early nineties a shift happened. And that shift had ushered in the south. No disrespect to the south but I wasn't feeling what Master P was saying. And neither did I typically enjoy gansta rap and it took me some time to like Corrupt & Daze, Snoop, Dr. Dre and Ice Cube. But the beats were infectious and I had to tune out the nasty put down of women and how they were being spoken of. And that is another “Speak On It” In itself. But to me this was technically considered real hip-hop, the truth, stories, fun, life and wonderful energy. I guess my love of hip hop is truly in the eighties. When a lot of groups and rappers came to the table and some were just one hit wonders. Oh! Oh! And I truly loved when hip-hop went conscience and jazzy!!

So now here we are in the new millennium and I loathe the music the industry has put out and are calling this hip-hop and it has been pure crap! Let me start off by giving you the definition of what hip hop is. The Urban Dictionary defines it as,A long definition but I do agree and its break down. Now in this report I do speak openly and honestly with no holds barred and I can tell you that the trash that is now considered hip-hop and rap is far from it and it is polluting the airwaves. What and who is Drake? Not feeling him. I think that maybe he should sit with DMX and learn some gritty raw raps. And yes DMX is one of the rappers that has made an indent in the world of rap. Maybe he should just stick to producing....hmmm... I use to not like and dislike Lil Wayne at the same time. And at one point and time he was a rapper. Maybe it's just me but how did you go from being hardcore gritty (dressing that is) to wearing leopard tights and looking like a glam-rock punk rock rapper. And what is and who is Niki Manaj??? Is she a rapper? I don't think so. Long gone are the days of Monie Love, Queen Latifa, Lil Kim, Foxy Brown (even though they brought glam to the game they had flow) Eve and there a sleuth of underground female rappers that didn't make it on the radio but had flow.

Long are the days when you got great acts with huge great lyrical flow. I know that when rap came out it was disliked by so many. Especially parents because they didn't want their children polluted with such filth. And when N.W.A hit the scenes with their gangsta rap it opened the doors for West Coast rappers while I admit my co-horts were digging the whole vibe of the likes such as Ice Cube, Snoop Dogg, Jayo Felony and a sleuth of other rappers that had one hitter quitter and made one album and then fell off. I too at a young age had an issue with the lyrics of Too short and E40 all the reference to women in a negative way didn't feel good to my ears. But at the end of the day I dug the production of this music because it was genius.

I believe rap has now turned into a huge conglomerate gimmick! And it is no longer a “skill” one must have to do sixteen bars. I am literally sickened by the “trap” music that pollutes the air!! Seriously! It all sounds the same to me. There are no real lyrics anymore, there is no more meaning, no cry, no pain, no history and no culture. Rick Ross and the likes rap of money food and fortune. So what! What happened to the innocence of battle rappers? Well Park and 106 keeps it gritty every Friday. I honestly enjoy the battle it reminds me of the “good ole days” Rap is a joke! And is mow way over a multi-millon dollar corporation in itself. Remember when the Grammy s didn't even acknowledge rap as music? Now it's in commercials, radio ads and white people are rapping! Not that I have anything against them bless them! But anything and everything that the African-American makes moves in musically is always taken from us and makes multi-millions for them. That is another story, and no I don't have anything against Eminem. Honestly he is a stand up rapper and guy who has many skills and holds true to what rapping is so I cannot downplay what he has brought to the game at all!

Rap is commercial and pop now, it is no longer a culture of grit and truth and lyrics. Though I am not a true hardcore Kanye West fan, but I again have to give him his props. I guess one could say or should say “Get your money man” hey I am far from a hater! But you can give me some X-Clan, EPMD and Biggie Smalls any day and tuning into the lyrics this is rap! The true stories and life of it. Why is it that acts such as Mos Def and Talib Kweli The Roots are not given major radio airplay however these acts and more are very prevalent to the culture of rap and have a conscience role that they continue to bring to the forefront. Long gone are the days it seems that “rap with a message” is popular to listeners and the industry. I sigh and shake my head to this because it is more needed now than ever. Am I a producer? Engineer? Performer of rapper? Far from it! But I do have an ear and taste for pure music and it seems those days are just a in-graded memory of my loving past and love for hip-hop. Black Sheep, Special Ed, Pharsyde I wish that all of you would come back and show these boys to men what real rap and music is all about!

Toy High



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